THE CORRECT THING 




LIBRARY OF CONGRESS. 

Shelf ^.6. 



UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. 




1 



TH E> 



Gofrect Thing for Catholics. 



BY / 

LELIA HARDIN BUGG, 



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I 



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NEW YORK, CINCINNATI, CHICAGO : 

BENZIGER BROTHERS, 

Printers to the Holy Apostolic See. 
1892. 



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Thb Library 
ep Congress 



WASHINGTON 






Copyright, 1891, by Benziger Brothers. 



THIS 

LITTLE BOOK 

IS HUMBLY INSCRIBED 

TO 

Saint 5o6epb 

IN GRATITUDE FOR SIGNAL FAVORS 

RECEIVED THROUGH 

HIS INTERCESSION. 

MARCH 22, 189I. 

L. H. B. 



PREFACE. 



These pages aim, to a limited extent, to be 
at once a guide for the exterior conduct of 
Catholics on some of the occasions where there 
is a liability of annoying mistakes, and a re- 
minder of obligations understood but often- 
times forgotten. 

In a country where Catholics in certain crude 
communities are still regarded with suspicion 
and dislike, and where even in more cultivated 
centres the clouds yet linger of ignorance and 
hereditary prejudice. Catholics are doubly 
bound to bring no reproach on the grand old 
Church. We are judged not as individuals but 
as Catholics ; therefore the lives of the children 
should be a hostage to public sentiment of the 
teachings of so beautiful a Mother. 

If these pages are of any assistance in pre- 
5 



6 Preface. 

venting mistakes, securing the observance of 
the conduct proper on special occasions, or 
causing more consideration for others, their 
mission will have been fulfilled. 

Clergymen have often spoken of the igno- 
rance and thoughtlessness, of the blunders, 
ludicrous and annoying when not serious, en- 
countered in their parochial work, and this led 
to the preparation of the little volume which it 
is hoped, in the conventional phrase, on which 
the copyright has long since expired, will "fill a 
long-felt want.'* 

L. H. B. 

Easter Monday, March 30, 1891. 



CONTENTS. 



PAGE 

Preface 5 

For Baptism , 9 

For Confession 17 

For Holy Communion 21 

For Confirmation 27 

For the Sick 29 

For a Funeral 36 

In Marriage Engagements 39 

At a Wedding 44 

In Church 50 

At High Mass 56 

During Lent 60 

During Holy Week 65 

At a Religious Reception or Profession 68 

When Visiting Convents 71 

In Regard to Indulgences 77 

When Calling on Clergymen 82 

In Addressing Ecclesiastics 86 

For Members of Church Associations 91 

7 . 



8 Contents, 

PAGE 

In Business 95 

For Business Women loi 

For Office-holders 106 

For a Citizen ... 109 

In Society. 112 

In Conversation 122 

In Matters of Dress 128 

In the Street 132 

In THE Street-cars 134 

When Shopping 136 

When Travelling 139 

In the Home Circle 144 

In Dealing with Servants 154 

In Education 159 

In Reading ► 163 

In Associating with non-Catholics 171 

When Travelling in Foreign Countries 177 

For Special Devotions 190 

In Regard to the Rosary 205 

In Saying the Rosary 210 



THE COREECT THING FOR BAPTISM. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To begin this little book with baptism, for 
that is usually the first important event in the 
life of every Christian. 

For parents to have their children baptized 
as soon as possible, especially if the infant is 
delicate and seems in danger of death. 

For any person, man, woman, or child to 
baptize a baby in danger of death where the 
priest cannot be had, or to baptize an adult if 
he has the proper dispositions, under the same 
circumstances. 

To use only pure water in baptism, pouring it 
on the head, at the same time pronouncing the 
words of baptism. 

To know that a person is not baptized if the 
water does not touch the skin. 

To have a child baptized in the parish 
church. 

9 



lO The Correct Thing 

To present it at the time set apart for admin- 
istering this sacrament, generally after Mass on 
week-days, after Mass or before, and after Ves- 
pers on Sundays. 

To have not more than two sponsors, a god- 
father and a godmother, nor less than one. 

To have the sponsor of the same sex as the 
child if there be only one. 

To have some one stand for the child by 
proxy if the sponsor desired cannot be present. 

To know that monks and nuns cannot be 
sponsors. 

To know that the priest who baptizes may be 
the sponsor, provided some one else holds the 
child and gives the answers. 

To invite only practical Catholics to stand 
for a child, and thus avoid the mortification of 
having the priest refuse to accept a non-Catho- 
lic. 

To mention if the child received private bap- 
tism. 

For the sponsor, or the one presenting the 
child at the font, to speak the name distinctly 
and thus avoid a repetition or a mistake. 



For Baptism, 1 1 

To hold the child with the head resting on 
the right arm of the sponsor. 

For parents to select at least one name of a 
saint for the child. 

To have the good sense not to expect the 
priest to baptize a child by a nickname, as 
Puss, Birdie, or Flossy, or a pagan name, such 
as Homer or Socrates. Or by a family name 
alone, as Walsingham Gargery. 

To have the clothing about the neck of the 
child loose, so that the priest may easily anoint 
the breast and back. 

For the sponsor to present an honorarium to 
the officiating clergyman. 

For the father to do likewise if he feels able. 

For sponsors to make a present to their god- 
child, expensive or trifling, as their purse or 
inclination may dictate. 

For sponsors to know that they are obliged in 
conscience to look after the religious require- 
ments of the child, if it is in danger of not 
being properly instructed. 

To have a christening dinner if the parents 
wish to do so, to which may be invited the 



12 The Correct Thing 

parish priest and the sponsors, and such inti- 
mate friends as are desired. 

To dress the girls in white and blue, and boys 
in brown during the first seven years of their 
lives, to show that they are consecrated to the 
Blessed Virgin. 

To put a little medal or some other sign of 
Christianity around the child's neck, and always 
keep it there. 

For sponsors to answer the responses clearly 
and with sincerity. 

To repeat audibly the Apostles' Creed and the 
Our Father when required to do so by the priest. 

For sponsors to place their right hands upon 
the child at the pouring of the water in the act 
of baptizing. 

To hold the candlestick when the priest pre- 
sents it. 

To remain after baptism until the record, 
with correct names, is made by the priest. 

To have the written permission of the rector, 
if some grave reason impels one to have his 
child baptized outside of the parish. 

To remember, apart from necessity, the par- 



For Baptism, 13 

ish priest or the one he delegates is the proper 
person to administer the sacraments to his par- 
ishioners. 

To remember that parents should not baptize 
their own children except in danger of death, 
when no one else is near. 

To know that solemn baptism should not be 
administered in a private house convenient to a 
church. 

For a mother to receive the blessing of the 
church after childbirth (the ceremony is called 
churching). 

To apply at the time appointed by the rector 
of the church. 

To bring a wax candle for use during the 
blessing. 

To make a contribution to the altar if a 
candle be supplied by the church. 

To kneel and hold the lighted candle in the 
left hand. 

To take with the right hand the end of the 
stole when presented by the priest. 

To remain some time in thanksgiving after 
being sprinkled with holy water. 



14 The Correct Thing 

To always have a Mass offered by way of 
thanksgiving. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To delay baptism ; such neglect may be- 
come a grievous sin. 

For a parent to baptize his own child, another 
person being accessible. 

For a christening party to present itself at 
the church when the priests are at dinner, or 
taking well-earned recreation. 

To ask, except in case of necessity, any one 
who is not an intimate friend to stand for the 
child. 

To think more of the worldly position than 
of the piety of the sponsors. 

To cherish any hopes that the godparents 
may leave their godchild a legacy ; that happens 
in story books but rarely in real life, unless the 
sponsor be a relative. 

To have the child so muffled that its head 
cannot be readily uncovered at the baptismal 
font. 

For the one presenting the child at the font 



For Baptism, 15 

to hold it in such a position that it is uncom- 
fortable, or to frighten it in any way, and thus 
give it an excuse for trying its vocal chords, to 
the annoyance of the priest and the confusion 
of all concerned. 

To fail to have it warmly clothed, or to ex- 
pose it through carelessness or ignorance to any 
danger of catching cold whilst undergoing the 
rite of becoming a Christian. 

To ask the officiating clergyman how much 
he charges for baptizing the child. [No charge 
is ever made for the administration of the sacra- 
ments ; custom demands an honorarium in pro- 
portion to the means of the ones concerned.] 

For the father to partake too freely of the 
flowing bowl in testimony of his joy at the addi- 
tion to his family. 

To bring a non-Catholic or Freemason as 
sponsor. 

To titter and giggle at the antics of the child, 
or pass remarks. 

To make the milk-bottle an intrusive part 
of the ceremony. 



1 6 The Correct Thing 

To neglect to wrap up the child before leav* 
ing the church when the weather is severe. 

To bring a proxy for a sponsor whose consent 
was not asked. 

For a mother to put off being '* churched*' 
too long. 

To apply to be churched before the baptism 
of the child. 

To neglect providing a wax candle or a suit- 
able offering. 

To hold the candle and stole with the same 
hand — often costly stoles are ruined by care- 
lessness of this kind. 

To pay insufficient attention or to have but 
little devotion during the blessing. 



At Confession. iL^ 



THE CORRECT THING AT CONFESSION. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For parents to have their children go to con- 
fession as soon as they reach the age of reason, 
generally considered to be when they reach 
their seventh year. 

For parents or teachers to assist their children 
in the examination of their conscience for their 
first confession. 

To have children go to confession every three 
months until they make their first Communion. 

For adults to go to confession once a month 
at least, and oftener if advised to do so. 

For women and children and those who are 
not employed during the day to go to confession 
in the afternoon, and leave the evenings and 
the hour just before supper for men and women 
who must work for their living. 

To examine the conscience well and with 
scrupulous thoroughness before going into the 
confessional, and thus avoid unnecessary delay. 



i8 The Correct Thing 

For a penitent to take his proper turn in 
going into the confessional, and not to \.rs to 
get in ahead of some one else. 

To courteously ask the one ahead for his 
turn if it is absolutely impossible to wait. 

For a woman of leisure and piety to offer 
her turn to a man in a hurry, or a working- 
woman whose time is precious. 

To reserve all matters extraneous from present 
sins about which one may want the advice of 
the priest for some other time than Saturday 
evening, when the confessional is surrounded by 
weary waiting sinners. 

To speak in a whisper, but distinctly, in a 
tone audible to the confessor but not to those 
kneeling around the confessional. 

To recite the Co?ifiteor before going into the 
confessional, if time is a consideration. 

To begin with the formula, '' Father, bless me, 
for I have sinned. Since my last confession 
which was one month ago" (or one week, two 
weeks, as the case may be), ** I have" — then 
follow the sins. 

To tell the number of times a sin has been 



At Confession^ 19 

committed, also any circumstance that would 
add to its gravity, so as to save all need of 
questionings on the part of the priest. 

To go up to the front of the church to say 
one's penance and other prayers, so as to be out 
of the way of the waiting penitents. 

It Is Not the Correct Thing 

To go into the confessional without having 
duly examined one's conscience and made all 
necessary preparation. 

To omit to state whether the penance imposed 
at the last confession was complied with and 
communion received. 

To speak in a tone so loud that those kneel- 
ing near the confessional are liable to overhear 
the confession. 

To speak so low and muffled that the priest 
has to ask for a repetition. 

To confess other people's sins, or to mention 
people's names. 

To be unduly scrupulous. 

To be careless and mechanical in making 
one's confession. 



20 The Correct Thing 

To leave the confessional before being dis- 
missed by the priest. 

To omit the act of contrition or to say it 
carelessly. 

To fail to ask the confessor to repeat the 
penance if not understood. 

To change confessors too often. 

To select a time for a general confession when 
the church is crowded with weary penitents. 

To try to rush in ahead of those kneeling 
around the confessional and awaiting their 
turn. 

To crowd up too near the confessional. 

To ignore the regulation which requires men 
to enter on one side and women on the other. 

To leave the church before making a thanks- 
giving and saying the penance enjoined, if time 
will possibly permit of fulfilling that duty. 

To tell any one what penance the priest im- 
posed. 

To ask a friend or any one what penance he 
received. 



At Holy Communion, 2i 



THE CORRECT THING AT HOLT COM- 
MUNION. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To prepare for Holy Communion by making 
a good confession, and by fasting from the mid- 
night previous. 

To be recollected and to avoid useless con- 
versation before going to the church, and on the 
way thither. 

To spend some time before Mass begins in 
preparatory devotions. 

To be dressed neatly and with scrupulous 
regard for cleanliness. 

For ladies to lift the veil and to remove the 
gloves before going up to the communion-rail- 
ing. 

To walk up to the railing quietly, making as 
little noise as possible, with the hands clasped 
upon the breast and eyes cast piously down. . 

To go up to the railing after the Domine non 
sum dignuSy when the bell rings three times. 



22 The Correct Thing 

To kneel in readiness near the front, if the 
railing is already filled. 

To make the sign of the cross devoutly as the 
priest pronounces the absolution. 

To hold the communion-cloth securely, with 
both hands under the chin, to raise the head 
and extend the tongue when the priest ap- 
proaches with the Sacred Host. 

To lower the head after receiving and rever- 
ently swallow the Sacred Host. 

To leave the railing almost immediately and 
in concert with those nearest, if there are others 
waiting to approach the holy table. 

To remain at the railing until the tabernacle 
is closed, if there be only a few communicants. 

To remain recollected and in fervent prayer 
until the end of Mass, before using the prayer- 
book. 

To spend some time, at least a quarter of an 
hour and longer if possible, after Mass in 
thanksgiving. 

To have a regular time for approaching Holy 
Communion, the first Friday of the month in 
honor of the Sacred Heart, a certain Sunday of 



At Holy Communion, 23 

the month, every fortnight, or every week, as 
conscience or the confessor decides, and to be 
scrupulous in performing this duty. 

To be thoroughly familiar with the scriptural 
proofs and injunctions in regard to Holy Com- 
munion and the teaching of the Church, so as 
to be ready and willing at all times to give a 
satisfactory and lucid explanation to non-Cath- 
olics. 

To know that the smallest quantity of food 
breaks the fast. 

To know that to swallow the saliva does not 
break the fast. 

To cleanse the mouth and teeth the evening 
before Communion. 

To remember that the fast is not required 
when Holy Communion is received as a viati- 
cum. 

To remember that one may offer his Holy 
Communion for any special intention, for a 
friend, for our Holy Father, superiors, relatives, 
the conversion of sinners, or the suffering souls 
in purgatory. 

To not forget one's own special needs. 



24 The Correct Thing 

To know that the tenth is the day for receiv- 
ing Holy Communion after making a novena. 

To know that every Catholic is bound to re- 
ceive Holy Communion within the Easter-time. 
In the United States this precept obliges from 
the first Sunday in Lent to Trinity Sunday in- 
clusive. 

To know that the paschal Communion should 
be received in one's own parish church. 

To know that one confined to his house by 
sickness is still obliged to receive Holy Com- 
munion there if he finds it impossible to go to 
the church. 

To notify the parish priest when aged or 
infirm persons are not able to approach Holy 
Communion in the church. 

For both parents and children to approach 
Holy Communion at times together. 

It Is Not the Correct Thing 

To go to a party or to the theatre the even- 
ing before approaching Holy Communion. 

To laugh and talk needlessly on the way to 
church. 



At Holy Communion, 25 

To omit making a preparation before Mass 
begins. 

To wear torn or soiled apparel. 

To have paint or powder on the face or eye- 
brows. 

To have soiled hands and long, dirty finger- 
nails. 

To stalk heavily up to the railing, the arms 
at the side, the eyes wandering around the 
church. 

To go up to the railing before the proper 
time. 

To wait until everybody is already at the 
railing and then go marching up, causing useless 
disturbance. 

To try to crowd in when the railing is already 
full, instead of waiting patiently for the next 
round. 

To wait until the priest has already started up 
the altar-steps, thinking that there are no more 
communicants, and then to go up to the railing, 
causing needless delay. 

To hold the communion-cloth so carelessly 
that if a particle of the Sacred Host were to fall 



26 The Correct Thi?ig 

from the lips it would be in danger of dropping 
off the cloth. 

To hold the head down so low that the priest 
has trouble in conveying the Sacred Host to the 
tongue. 

To remain kneeling at the railing when others 
are waiting to approach. 

To walk hurriedly back to the seat with the 
hands unclasped and the eyes not cast down. 

To clasp the hands with the fingers pointing 
downward. 

To rush out of church as soon as Mass is 
over w^ithout making any thanksgiving. 

To expectorate shortly after receiving. 

To have no regular time for approaching the 
Sacraments of penance and the Holy Eucharist. 

To go but once a year, or even every few 
months. 

To give vague^ and worse still, erroneous 
explanations in regard to the Holy Eucharist 
when questioned by non-Catholics. 



For Confirmation, 27 

THE CORRECT THIKG FOR CONFIRMA- 
TION. 

ft is the Correct Thing 

For children to be confirmed at the first op- 
portunity after they have made their first Com- 
munion. 

For adults who neglected to receive this 
sacrament in their youth to do so at the first 
chance offered. Those who neglect are guilty 
of grievous sin. 

To prepare for the reception of this sacra- 
ment by a good confession, as the Holy Ghost 
will not enter a soul defiled with sin. 

For young girls to wear white, and the boys 
neat new suits. 

To study carefully beforehand the ceremonies 
and symbols used in the administration of this 
sacrament. 

To know that this sacrament can be received 
only once, and that a person would commit a 
sacrilege if he attempted to receive it a second 
time. And that it would also be a sacrilege to 
receive it in mortal sin. 



28 The Correct Thing 

To take the name of one's favorite saint for a 
confirmation name. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

For parents to neglect to have their children 
confirmed after they have made their first 
Communion. 

For adults who have had no opportunity to 
receive the sacrament of confirmation in youth 
to continue to live without its grace. 

To receive this sacrament carelessly and in 
ignorance of its meaning. 

To omit a contribution in proportion to one's 
means towards defraying the expense attendant 
upon the administration of this sacrament. 

To be confirmed with the baptismal name. 

To omit sponsors at confirmation. 

To forget that sponsors for confirmation, like 
godparents at baptism, are related by spiritual 
affinity to their godchildren as well as the 
parents of their godchildren ; hence godparents 
cannot marry godchildren or the parents of their 
godchildren, yet one godparent may marry the 
other. 



For the Sick, 29 



THE CORRECT THING FOR THE SICK. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To send for the parish priest as soon as a 
person becomes dangerously ill. 

For the sick person, if not in imminent danger 
of death, to make his confession during the first 
visit of the priest, and to wait for a second visit 
for the Holy Communion. 

For the nurse or some member of the patient's 
family to place a chair for the priest by the side 
of the bed, raise the patient to a comfortable 
posture, inquire of the priest if he desires any- 
thing, and then withdraw whilst the confession 
is being heard. 

To keep everybody from intruding in the sick- 
room whilst the priest is hearing the confession 
and giving spiritual consolation. 

When the priest is expected with the Holy 
Communion, to have the room put in order and 
everything made ready. 



30 The Correct Thing 

To have a table prepared, covered with a 
clean white cloth, and upon it at least one 
candlestick holding a blessed wax candle lighted, 
a crucifix, two small glasses, one containing holy 
water and the other pure fresh water (for the 
ablution after Communion), and a tablespoon. 

For some one holding a lighted candle to 
meet the priest at the door when he arrives with 
the Blessed Sacrament, and to precede him to 
the place prepared. 

For all in the room to kneel when the priest 
enters with the Sacred Host. 

After the priest has sprinkled the bed with 
holy water, repeated the antiphon, " Asperges 
77ie^ Thou shalt sprinkle me," etc., and said the 
prayer, ^^ Exaudi nos^ Doinine'' for an attend- 
ant to recite the Confiteor^ if the patient is too 
weak to do so. 

To have the hair combed, the face washed, 
the mouth rinsed out, and the bed of the sick 
person made tidy before the priest arrives. 

For one who suffers a prolonged illness to re- 
ceive Holy Communion frequently, even though 
not in danger of death. 



For the Sick 31 

To know that the receiving of Holy Com- 
munion, even as Viaticum, will not hasten death. 

To know that a sick person need not be fast- 
ing in order to receive the Holy Viaticum. 

For a person who is dangerously ill to attend 
to all worldly matters the first thing, so that 
there will be nothing to distract the mind from 
spiritual concerns. 

To receive Extreme Unction whilst the patient 
still has the use of his senses. 

To sponge off the parts to be anointed — the 
eyes, the ears, the nostrils, the mouth, the hands, 
the feet — before the arrival of the priest. 

To know that Extreme Unction can be re- 
ceived only once in the same sickness, unless 
there is a partial recovery and then a serious 
relapse, in which case it may be received again. 

To know that only those in danger of death 
by sickness can receive this sacrament ; that 
soldiers going to battle, persons in a storm at 
sea, criminals about to be executed, cannot re- 
ceive Extreme Unction. 

To know, however, that soldiers who have 
been wounded, persons dying from an accident, 



32 The Correct Thing, 

those washed ashore in whom life is not yet 
extinct, can and should be anointed. 

To know that infants and born idiots cannot 
be anointed, since they cannot commit sin. 

To know that those dying impenitent, or in a 
state of mortal sin — as a drunkard in his drunken- 
ness — or in the commission of a crime — as a man 
shot in a duel — cannot receive this sacrament 
unless there is some reason to think that at the 
moment of death there is sincere penitence. 

For all present at the administration of the last 
sacraments to join in the prayers for the dying. 

If the patient be a woman, for another woman 
to make the sign of the cross upon her fore- 
head, mouth, and breast, if she is unable to do 
so herself at the proper time in the prayers for 
the dying. 

For a patient to accept the illness as coming 
from God, and to bear the suffering in union 
with the sufferings and death of Our Lord. 

To be patient and resigned. To take the 
medicine and nourishment prescribed. 

To have a crucifix, a rosary, and some holy 
water constantly within reach. 

For relatives and friends to be as calm and 



For the Sick, 33 

composed as possible. To exclude all worldly 
considerations from the chamber of the dying. 

For some one of those in attendance on a 
dying person to keep reciting suitable prayers 
until the soul has left the body. 

To have one or more blessed candles lighted 
near the bedside. 

To press the crucifix to the dying lips and to 
sprinkle the bed repeatedly with holy water. 

To know that candles are blessed in all 
churches on Candlemas-day, and that every 
Catholic should provide himself with some. 

To know that the candles should be wax. 

To know that all members of a parish, whether 
they go to the parish church or not, can only 
be attended in case of sickness by the priests 
belonging to the parish, unless in special cases 
permission is obtained from the parish rector 
to have a priest from another parish who may 
have been the confessor or the life-long friend of 
the person who is ill. 

To always provide a companion or attendant 
when sending for a priest after dark. 

To insist upon seeing the priest back home to 
his own house. 



34 The Correct Thing. 

To abstain from conversation if the priest is 
carrying the Blessed Sacrament, and to accom- 
pany with prayer. 

In country places where the priest lives a great 
distance and his call entails expense, to cover 
the amount not with thanks alone, but with 
means to pay railroad fare or horse hire. 

It is Not the Corirect Thing 

To defer sending for the priest until death is 
imminent and the patient almost speechless. 

To go for the priest in the middle of the night 
when the patient is not in danger of dying 
without the sacraments. 

To omit having the table with the candle, etc., 
prepared when the priest is expected with the 
Sacred Host. 

To use a dingy or colored cover, a broken 
spoon, a dirty glass for the water, or a candle 
that has not been blessed. 

To be without holy water.* 

To have no crucifix in the house. 

To forget to light the candles. 

* Holy water is blessed every Sunday before the High Mass and may be ob- 
tained by any one providing a clean bottle. Ask the serving boy, or if there is 
a fail for the convenience of the people, help yourself . 



For the Sick. 35 

To allow any one in the room who will not 
act with proper respect whilst the priest is ad- 
ministering the sacraments. 

To alarm the patient with exaggerated accounts 
of his illness. 

To deceive the patient with false assurances 
as to his condition. 

To oppose sending for the priest if the patient 
desires his presence, whether he is in danger of 
death or not. 

To omit telling the priest when a visit of con- 
solation merely is desired, so that he can choose 
his own time for paying the call. 

To omit informing the priest when any mem- 
ber of a family is ill. 

To go for a priest outside of the parish, as a 
priest is not supposed to answer sick-calls out- 
side of his own parish. 

To allow whispering, needless talking, or 
strong outbursts of grief in the sick-room whilst 
the priest is administering the sacraments. 

To omit saying the prayers for the dying if 
the priest can not be had. 

To be careless, etc., in complying with the last 
requests of the dying. 



S6 The Correct Thing, 



THE CORRECT THING FOR A FUNERAL. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For the relatives and nearest friends of the 
deceased to have Masses said as soon as possible 
for the repose of his soul. 

To have the funeral conducted from the 
parish church. 

To have a Requiem Mass celebrated on the 
day of the funeral. 

To place a crucifix on the lifeless breast in 
the coffin. 

To keep blessed candles constantly burning 
around the remains. 

To refuse admission to all callers save rela- 
tives and very dear friends. 

For a Catholic to be buried in a Catholic 
cemetery, or at least in a consecrated grave. 

To pay church expenses connected with a 
funeral in advance. 



For a Funeral. 37 

It Is Not the Correct Thing 

For relatives and friends to spend a great deal 
of money for flowers and the trappings of woe 
and little or none for Masses. 

For those in attendance at a "wake " to make 
it the occasion of merriment. 

For people who are not rich to have a great 
many carriages. 

For friends who cannot afford the expense to 
send expensive floral offerings. 

To have a Protestant minister hold any kind 
of funeral services over the body of a Catholic in 
deference to the feelings of his Protestant rela- 
tives. 

For friends to spend money for a carriage and 
for flowers and neglect to have a Mass offered up 
for the departed soul. 

To make a vulgar display of a profusion of 
flowers and a long line of carriages. 

To expect a consecrated grave and a priest to 
conduct funeral service for one who refused the 
ministrations of the Church whilst living. 

For friends to be careless and neglectful 
about attending the funeral and offering the 



38 The Correct Thing, 

consolation of sympathy and any little service 
in their power to the bereaved family. 

For mere acquaintances and strangers to 
crowd the church through a morbid curiosity, 
and to attempt to get front seats which belong 
by all courtesy and right to the mourners. 

And worse still, for them to take advantage 
of so sad an occasion to get a free drive, and 
occupy carriages provided for relatives and 
friends. 

To speak of the faults of the dead. 



In Marriage Engagements. 39 



THE CORRECT THING IN MARRIAGE 
ENGAGEMENTS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For a young lady to think well about what she 
is doing before engaging herself in marriage. 

For a young man to ponder seriously the same 
subject. 

As a general rule, for Catholics to marry 
Catholics. 

In case that one of the parties to a marriage 
engagement is a Protestant, to ascertain that 
there will be no trouble in obtaining all the 
promises required by the Church from the non- 
Catholic before announcing the engagement. 

To ascertain in all cases where a dispensation 
is required whether it can be procured without 
any difficulty before announcing an engagement. 

To know that a dispensation is required for 
Catholics to marry non-Catholics, cousins within 
and including the fourth degree; persons related 
by marriage within the fourth degree; persons 



40 The Correct Thmg 

connected by spiritual affinity — sponsors, god- 
children, etc. 

To know that dispensations are not mere mat- 
ters of form, and that they will not be given un- 
less there are grave reasons for doing so. 

To know that a tax for some charitable object 
must be given when obtaining a dispensation. 

To give timely notice of an engagement to 
the parish priest, so that the banns may be pub- 
lished three successive Sundays. 

To consult parents, or other persons of sound 
judgment, and the pastor, before entering into 
an engagement of marriage. 

To remember that both head and heart 
should agree in the choice of a companion for 
life. 

For a rich young man to give his fiance a 
handsome diamond solitaire engagement-ring. 

For one who is poor to select an inexpensive 
ring in keeping with his means, and save his 
money for the more necessary needs of house- 
keeping. 

For a prospective bride in the preparation of 
her trousseau to patronize orphan industrial in- 



In Marriage Engagements, 41 

stitutions, religious communities who make a 
specialty of this kind of work, and needy and 
deserving seamstresses, in preference to those 
who are merely fashionable. 

To insist on having a quiet wedding if the 
parents cannot afford the expense of an elabo- 
rate one. 

For a prospective bride to make a religious 
retreat in a convent, or wherever it is most 
convenient, before her wedding-day. A like 
exercise would be very beneficial for the groom.. 

To have the banns proclaimed on three suc- 
cessive Sundays in the parishes of both the con- 
tracting parties. 

For an engaged couple to avoid public dis- 
plays of affection, which are both vulgar and 
indiscreet. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To enter into an engagement without due 
deliberation. 

To enter into an engagement merely for 
amusement, as an outcome of a summer's ac- 
quaintance, and with no intention of fulfilling it 



42 The Co7'rect Thing 

by marriage. Such a course is not only un- 
christian, but decidedly ill-bred ; and a young 
lady who is guilty of such an impropriety brings 
down upon herself the severest strictures of 
society. 

To receive marked attentions from a stranger 
whose antecedents and past conduct are not 
perfectly well known. 

For a young lady to permit serious and ex- 
clusive attentions from a gentleman whom she 
has no thought of marrying. 

To receive expensive presents from a gentle- 
man. Both social usage and womanly instinct 
forbid this. 

To go out driving alone with a gentleman. 

To marry a man simply because he is rich. 

To enter into an engagement without the 
consent and approval of parents or guardians. 

To let parents persuade one into a marriage 
of convenience where there is no congeniality. 

To think more of the worldly advantages than 
of the spiritual effects of a marriage. 

To give up all the time of an engagement to 
amusement and none to religious duties. 



In Marriage Engagements, 43 

For a bride to have her trousseau made 
where she can have it done the cheapest, with 
no thought to the suffering of underpaid seam- 
stresses. If she wishes a blessing stitched in 
with the dainty laces, she will try to make her 
wedding an occasion of benefit to the poor, and 
to all who have anything to do with it. 

To insist on a costly wedding where the 
parents cannot afford it. 

To seek to have the proclamation of the 
banns dispensed with unless there is an especial 
reason for doing so. 

To blame the priest because marriage is de- 
layed through ignorance of the contracting 
pa«rties or neglect in giving timely notice. 



44 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING FOR A WEDDING. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To be married in the parish church. 

To be married in the morning at a nuptial 
Mass. 

For the bride and bridegroom to approach 
Holy Communion on their wedding-da3\ 

For their parents and near relatives to do the 
same thing. 

For the bridal cortege to be on time and not 
keep the clergyman and guests waiting. 

To remember that by receiving the sacra- 
ment of matrimony in a state of mortal sin one 
commits a sacrilege, and forfeits all the graces 
attached to its worthy reception. 

To remember that Lent and Advent are pro- 
hibited times for solemnizing marriage. 

To defray promptly all expenses connected 
with a wedding, such as lights, decorations, 
music, etc. 

For a bridegroom, through his best man, to 



For a Wedding, 45 

present the officiating clergyman with a sum in 
proportion to his means and his joy at winning 
a bride. Ten dollars is considered a decent 
honorary, which may be increased according to 
means. 

If the wedding is in the evening, for the 
bride, bridesmaids, and invited guests to be 
properly attired. (Evening weddings are gen- 
erally forbidden by the Bishops, hence they are 
not usual now.) 

For the guests to remember that talking and 
whispering are as much out of place at a church 
wedding as such conduct would be at any other 
time in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. 

For the bride to omit gloves. 

For the bridegroom to have the ring placed 
upon the plate. 

To present the license where the law requires 
such. 

To have at least two witnesses. 

To give the proper names of the contracting 
parties. 

To join hands whilst reciting the marriage 
formula. 



46 The Correct Thing 

To kneel in the sanctuary if place be pro- 
vided. 

For attendants and witnesses to kneel in the 
front pews. 

To kneel at the lowest altar-step at the Pater 
Noster, when assisting at the nuptial Mass. 

To receive Holy Communion at the priedieu. 

To approach the altar-step before the bless- 
ing. 

If the rector have other arrangements than 
the above, to follow them. 

For the people of a parish to remember that 
a wedding is a private affair, and that only those 
invited are expected to attend. 

To make a wedding an occasion of joy to the 
relatives and friends of the contracting parties, 
and also to the poor. 

To have an elegant and costly reception if 
one's means permit. 

For a bride to be dignified, affable, modest, 
and winning at her bridal reception. 

It Is Not the Correct Thing 

To want to be married in other than the parish 



For a Wedding. 47 

church simply because it may not be a fashion- 
able or costly structure. 

To omit the nuptial Mass without some grave 
reason. 

To be married in the evening if it can be 
avoided. 

To require expensive decorations in the 
church without advancing the means to pay 
for them. 

To make any arrangement about organist, 
singers, or music, without consulting the rector 
of the church beforehand. 

To introduce favorite secular songs or secu- 
larized religious music into the service. This is 
exceedingly bad form. All attraction in a 
Catholic church is at the altar, not in the choir- 
loft. 

For the bride and groom to come to the 
church unaccompanied. 

To come late, to forget the ring or license. 

To neglect a suitable honorary for the officiat- 
i;ag clergyman. 

To endeavor to introduce unusual or un- 
Catholic ceremonies in the church. 



48 The Correct Thing 

To fail in procuring the necessary dispensa- 
tion in cases of mixed marriages. 

To give any but the true family name, even 
when a person for some reason may be known 
by another. 

To begin congratulations before the parties 
have left the church. 

To forget that the late council of Baltimore 
prohibited the celebration of weddings in church 
after five o'clock in the evening. 

To omit going to confession and Communion 
before receiving the sacrament of marriage. 

To ask for a dispensation as to the prohibited 
times of marriage without some exceedingly 
grave reason. A wedding should be a time of 
joy, and is therefore out of place in a season of 
preparation and penance. In case a dispensa- 
tion is granted the marriage must be private. 

To be niggardly in feeing the clergyman. 
Clergymen make a practice of accepting nothing 
from those in poverty. 

For a woman to enter the church in a de- 
collete gown. 

For bridesmaids or guests to go into the pres- 



For a Wedding, 49 

ence of the Blessed Sacrament without a cover- 
ing on their heads. 

To laugh, talk, or whisper in church. 

For those not invited to seek to enter a 
church at a wedding, as if it were a mere show. 

To spend more than can be well afforded on 
wedding festivities. 

For those invited who cannot afford the ex- 
pense to send costly presents. 

For a bride to be giddy at her wedding re- 
ception. 

For guests to manifest their good feeling by 
imbibing too freely of the wines provided. It 
is very easy for a man to drink more than he 
can stand at a wedding banquet, and yet there 
is no conduct more ungentlemanly and more 
annoying to the hostess. 

To omit an invitation to the reception to the 
officiating clergyman and the priests of the 
parish. 



so The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN CHURCH. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To always be in time for Mass and other 
services in the church. 

To remember that the church-bells are rung 
for a purpose and not merely to keep the sexton 
busy, and that it would be well therefore to obey 
their call. 

For every member of a parish to rent a pew 
or at least a seat in the parish church. 

To take holy water upon entering the church. 

To make the sign of the cross on the person 
and not in the air. 

To genuflect on the right knee and to have it 
touch the floor. 

To remember that the King of kings is present 
on the altar, and to order one's conduct accord- 
ingly. 

To avoid whispering, laughing, and looking 
about in church. 



In Church. 51 

To walk gently up the aisle if one is unavoid- 
ably detained until after the services have be- 
gun. 

To make a short act of adoration on bended 
knees after entering the pew. 

To be devout and recollected at the different 
parts of the Mass. 

To .remember that mere bodily presence in 
the church with the mind wandering to tem- 
poral concerns, does not fulfil the precept of 
hearing Mass. 

To pay attention to the sermon, and make it 
the subject of one's thoughts during the day, as 
also during the week. 

To remember when special collections are to 
be taken up, and to have a contribution ready 
in your hand. 

To make a practice of putting something in 
the contribution-box every Sunday. To train 
children to this practice. 

To listen to the music as a means of elevating 
the heart to God. 

For a gentleman occupying a pew to move in 
or rise and let ladies pass in before him. 



52 The Correct Thing 

For pew-holders to offer seats in their pews 
to strangers. 

To seat non-Catholics rather away from the 
altar. Experience teaches that they often for- 
get their manners. 

For men too stingy to have seats of their own 
in church to occupy the free pews, and not 
blockade the entrance by standing, or kneeling 
on one knee, around it. 

To avoid coughing, moving the feet around, 
or making any noise to the annoyance of clergy 
and people. 

To leave babies at home or with a neighbor 
when going to church. 

For a mother who has her child with her at 
church to get up and take it out when it begins 
to cry or fret. 

To be punctilious in following the ceremonials 
of the church, standing, kneeling, etc., at the 
proper times. 

For non-Catholics who go to Catholic churches 
to conform to the services, and to remember 
that this is a requirement of good breeding. 

For Catholics to keep away from Protestant 



In Church, 



53 



services. It is strictly prohibited to acknowledge 
heretical worship or assent to heretical doctrine. 

For members of the choir to sing for the glory 
of God and not for their own. 

To take an earnest Protestant to hear a good 
sermon. 

To remain kneeling until the last prayers have 
been said and the priest has retired to the 
sacristy. 



It is Not the Correct Thing 

To be late for Mass or any church service. 

To stalk hurriedly and noisily up the aisle. 

To ignore the holy water font at the entrance. 

To make the sign of the cross as if fanning off 
flies. 

To give a little bobbing curtsy, instead of the 
proper genuflection, before entering one's pew. 

To whisper, laugh, or cause any distraction to 
those around. 

To deliberately turn around, stare up at the 
choir, or at those entering the church. 

To go to sleep, or read the prayer-book during 
the sermon. (This is unpardonable.) 



54 The Correct Thing 

To be in an ecstatic condition of devotion 
when the contribution-box approaches. 

To forget all about the special collections for 
the orphans, the church debt, the pope, etc. 

To go to High Mass simply to listen to the 
music as one would go to the opera. 

For a person occupying the end seat to scowl 
forbiddingly at all those who seek to enter the 
pew. 

For a person to go to a private pew without 
an invitation. 

To take babies and crying children to 
church. 

To make a rush for the door before the priest 
has even descended the altar to begin the con- 
cluding prayers. 

To go to church at the last moment and to 
leave it at the first. 

To take non-Catholics to Mass who will not 
behave themselves as the presence of the 
Blessed Sacrament demands. When the ques- 
tion of offence is between God and man, there 
should be no hesitation in deciding. 



In Church. 55 

To kneel on only one knee, or to emulate the 
position of the bear when saying one's prayers. 

For members of the choir to forget that the 
choir-loft is a part of the church, and that talk- 
ing, laughing, giggling, chewing gum, and other 
practices which have been known to prevail in 
some choirs are strictly out of place. It has 
been remarked that in choir conduct Catholic 
members, to their shame, suffer in comparison 
with Protestants. 

For members of the congregation to find fault 
with the sermon, criticise the clergyman, and re- 
tail gossip on their way home from church, as is 
done in China and other places in the Orient. 



56 The Correct Thing 



AT HIGH MASS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To be in time. To stand at the Asperges 
me. To make the sign of the cross when 
sprinkled. 

To kneel until the Gloria. 

To rise and remain standing whilst this hymn 
is being recited by the celebrant. 

To sit whilst it is being sung by the choir. 

To sit whilst the celebrant sits. 

To rise with the celebrant and remain stand- 
ing until the chanting of the Epistle. 

To sit from the beginning of the Epistle to the 
Gospel, 

To remain standing durins; the sincrins of the 
Gospel. 

To make the sign of the cross on forehead, 
lips, and breast. 

To kneel if the Ve?ii Creator is sung before 
the sermon. 



At High Mass. 57 

To sit until the reading of the Gospel by the 
preacher. 

To stand while the preacher reads the Gospel 
in the vernacular. 

To sit still and listen attentively to the word 
of God. 

To stand whilst the Creed is being said by the 
celebrant. 

To sit while it is sung by the choir. 

To stand at the Dominus Vobiscum and Ore- 
f/tus. 

To sit or kneel at the Offertory. 

To stand whilst being incensed at a solemn 
High Mass. 

To stand at the singing of the Preface and 
the Pater Noster. 

To kneel at the Sanctus and remain on the 
knees until after the first ablution. 

To stand at the Orations and until the singing 
of the Ite Missa est. 

To devoutly receive the blessing kneeling, 
and to bless one's self. 

To stand at the Gospel^ making the sign of the 
cross on forehead, lips, and breast. 



58 The Correct Thing 

To leave babbling babies at home. [Write 
this deep in the memory.] 

To remain in one's seat until after the priest 
has left the sanctuary. 

To remember that the church vestibule is not 
a reception-room for the interchange of friendly 
greetings and current gossip. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To march up the aisle to a front pew if one 
enters the church after Mass has begun. 

To whisper in church or to nod to acquaint- 
ances. 

To stand, sit, or kneel, just as it suits one's 
fancy to do, without any regard to the services. 

To turn in one's seat and stare up at the 
choir, or spread out the arms on the back of the 
pew. 

To go to church to learn the latest fashions. 

To fail to take along a prayer-book or rosary. 

To impede the exit from the church by stand- 
ing to talk to one's friends. 

For men and boys to loiter around the church 
entrance, staring at passers-by. 



At High Mass, 59 

For those occupying pews near the altar to 
attempt to leave the church first. 

To omit to take holy water at the church- 
door on leaving, or to converse while leaving. 

To fail to remain for a meeting or conference 
called by the rector. 

To remain seated and to stare at the people as 
they pass out. 

To leave the church as if exhausted and glad 
to get out. [A little meditation might inform 
such a person that he does not know what he is 
doing — is ignorant of the doctrines of his 
Church, or the state of his interior requires con- 
siderable repairing.] 



6o The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING FOR LENT. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To begin the holy and penitential season of 
Lent by assisting at Mass and partaking of the 
blessed ashes on Ash Wednesday. 

To resolve to observe all the regulations of 
the church as far as one is able. 

To abstain from all worldly amusements from 
motives of piety and not because it is bad form 
to keep up social dissipations during Lent. 
Society closes its doors during this time. 

To decline all invitations to amusements. 

To remember that a woman who is able to 
keep up the round of social enjoyments all 
winter ought to be able to fast during Lent. 

To be punctilious about attending the Lenten 
devotions Sundays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. 

To assist at the daily Mass if at all possible. 

To take but one full meal on any day in Lent 
(Sundays excepted), and then not till after 
twelve o'clock. 

To know that when it is the custom to take 



For Lent, 61 

dinner in the evening and not at midday, a col- 
lation is permitted in the morning. 

To know that fish (oysters) and meat cannot 
be used at the same m^al during any day in 
Lent, even on Sundays. 

To know that meat is allowed but once a day 
except on Sundays. 

To know that on Wednesdays and Fridays 
meat is not allowed, nor is it allowed on the 
second Saturday in Lent (Ember-day) or Holy 
Saturday. That if the dinner or full meal is 
taken at noon, one may take a cup of tea, 
coffee, or thin chocolate in the morning, and a 
collation, which is about the one-fourth of any 
ordinary meal, in the evening. 

To know that one is obliged to fast as soon 
as he finishes his twenty-first year, or begins his 
twenty-second. 

That children should abstain from meat when 
they reach the age of seven years. 

To remember that abstinence and fasting are 
two different things. 

Every Friday in the year is a day of absti- 
nence but is not a fast-day. 



62 The Correct Thing 

Every day in Lent except Sundays is a fast- 
day. 

To remember that sick, convalescent, or deli- 
cate people are not obliged to fast. That those 
engaged at hard labor, tradesmen generally, rail- 
roaders, steamboat-men, etc., are not obliged to 
fast. 

To know that every Saturday in the year is a 
day of abstinence like Friday, but the people in 
the United States are exempt at the present 
time. 

To lay aside the pipe or the bottle during 
Lent. 

To devote the time of Lent to a building up 
of one's spiritual life. 

To make Lent a red-letter period for the poor 
and suffering. 

To remember that travellers should keep Lent 
abroad as well as at home, and that the mere 
fact of leaving home does not abrogate the 
Lenten obligations. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To begin the Lenten season by grumbling. 



For Lent. 63 

To keep Lent because it is fashionable to do 
so. 

To occupy one's time in preparing for the 
post-Lenten festivities. 

To fail to attend the Stations of the Cross, as 
well as the Wednesday and Sunday evening in- 
structions. 

To neglect daily Mass when able to attend. 
In cities where there are early Masses in nearly 
all churches, one who wishes, with a little morti- 
fication, may attend Mass. 

To neglect spiritual reading, religious instruc- 
tions, and acts of self-denial. 

To omit v/orks of charity when the occasion 
of doing good presents itself. 

To begin Lent with the proper dispositions, 
and relax before it is over. 

To neglect works of penance when one is free 
from the obligations of fasting. 

To take milk, thick chocolate, or highly sweet- 
ened coffee in the morning. 

To take butter, eggs, cake, pie, or anything 
but a cracker in the morning. 

To eat meat at the evening collation. 



64 The Correct Thing 

To be guided by the example of negligent 
Catholics rather than the written law of the 
Church. 

To discuss the propriety or impropriety of 
the Lenten regulations, or to find fault with 
them. 

To forget that far from being a pleasure, the 
Lenten season is a time of penance and should 
be spent accordingly. 

For parents to show a negligence in the ob- 
servance of Lent, and thus give bad example 
to their children. 

For any one to dispense himself from the 
Lenten obligation. 

To forget that the pastor is the proper person 
to dispense. 



During Holy Week, 65 



THE CORRECT THING DURING HOLY 
WEEK. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To redouble one's devotions during Holy 
Week. 

To be on time for all the Holy Week services. 

To provide one's self with a Holy Week 
manual so as to be able to follow the services 
with intelligence and spiritual profit. 

To contribute to the fund for decorating the 
repository for Holy Thursday in the parish 
church. 

To genuflect on both knees when visiting 
repositories on Holy Thursday, as is the regula- 
tion at all times when the Blessed Sacrament is 
exposed in a church. 

To peremptorily stop all whispering and irrev- 
erence on the part of non-Catholic companions 
who accompany one from motives of curiosity 
to the different churches. 

To remember that one who walks to the dif- 



66 The Correct Thing 

ferent churches visited gains more merit than 
one who rides, other things being equal. 

To receive Holy Communion on Holy Thurs- 
day. 

To know that a great many indulgences can 
be obtained by piously attending the Holy 
Week services. 

To go up one aisle and to come down another 
when visiting repositories in crowded churches, 
so as to avoid jostling against the throng. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To think that by being pious during Holy 
Week one can atone for laxity during the other 
five weeks of Lent. 

To straggle into the church after the services 
have begun. 

To gaze around or to whisper during the 
solemn serv'ices. 

To sit down where the ritual requires one to 
kneel or stand. 

Through negligence to fail to provide one's 
self with a Holy Week manual, and thereby for 
the sake of fifty cents, or to save a little trouble. 



During Holy Week, 67 

to miss the abundant spiritual benefits which 
accrue from faithfully following the services. 

To forget that the beautiful repositories with 
their wealth of flowers and their dazzling tapers 
cost money. 

To fail to make the proper genuflection upon 
entering and leaving the church. 

To answer the questions of non-Catholic com- 
panions whilst in the presence of the Blessed 
Sacrament. 

To turn Holy Thursday into a day of pleasure. 

To be so ungrateful for the inestimable bless- 
ing of the Blessed Sacrament as to fail to ap- 
proach the holy table on the day of its institu- 
tion. 



6S ^ The Correct Thing 



AT A EELIGIOUS RECEPTION OR PRO- 
FESSION. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To solicit an invitation to a religious recep- 
tion if one has any particular reason for desiring 
to be present. 

For guests to go in time so as to be in their 
places before the ceremonies begin. 

To yield the front seats to the relatives and 
friends of the novices and candidates. 

To let one's conduct be as reverential as it 
should be at any other time in the presence of 
the Blessed Sacrament. 

To avoid standing up on the seats in order 
to get a better view of the ceremonies. 

To refrain from whispered comments on the 
appearance of the brides-elect or the cere- 
monies. 

To be contented to stand if there are no 
vacant seats. 



At a Religious Reception or Profession. 69 

To congratulate the new religious on their 
admission into the conventual life. 

If there is a particular Sister whom one wishes 
to see, to go to the parlor and ask for her. 

For the parents or guardian of the candidate 
for the religious life to provide her with a white 
gown, tulle veil, etc., exactly as for a bride of 
the world. 

For relatives and friends to partake of the 
collation in convents where it is customary to 
provide one. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To go to a religious reception to which invita- 
tions have been issued, without such invitation. 

To forget that it is just as rude to go to a re- 
ception at a convent after the ceremonies have 
begun as it would be to arrive late at a dinner- 
party. 

For strangers to crowd into the front seats, to 
the annoyance of the relatives and friends who 
have a right to them. 

To talk, laugh, or stare about. 

To be offended if an invitation is refused. 



7© The Correct T/mtg 

To forget that convent chapels are usually 
small and can only contain a limited number of 
persons. 

To go to a reception and then rush off with- 
out a word of congratulation to the new re- 
ligious. 

To take advantage of one's admission into 
the convent precincts to wander around the 
building and intrude in places forbidden to lay 
people to enter. 

For those who are neither relatives nor 
friends of the new Sisters to partake of the re- 
freshments provided, unless asked by one of the 
Sisters to do so. 

To partake of the hospitality of the convent 
and then turn around and criticise one's enter- 
tainers. 



When Visiting Convents, 71 



THE COEEECT THING WHEN VISITING 
CONVENTS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To make one's visits to a convent on the 
regulation visiting-days. 

To show the same good breeding one would 
in a private house. 

To comply with all the regulations in regard 
to visitors. 

If one desires to go through the house, to ask 
the Superior if it would be convenient to her to 
grant that privilege. 

To let the Sister who is conducting the visit- 
ors through the house invariably lead the way. 

To pause but a moment in a room where the 
pupils are assembled, unless invited to remain 
longer. 

To be careful not to disturb the nuns at their 
devotions nor the children at their studies by 
loud tones or laughter. 

To ask any desired information in a court- 
eous, well-bred way. 



72 The Correct Thing 

To remember that there are some things 
which are purely private. 

To kneel for a moment when taken to the 
chapel. Christians can avail themselves of the 
opportunity to say an extra prayer, and ad- 
vanced thinkers (?) can demonstrate their good 
breeding by an outward conformance to usage. 

To genuflect when passing the chapel door. 

To avoid stepping on the polished floors when 
there is matting spread to protect them. 

To refrain from all uncomplimentary com- 
ments. 

To remember that Sisters are no fonder of 
fulsome flattery than other people, and no more 
obtuse in recognizing it. 

To show proper appreciation in the studio 
and the museum. 

To listen respectfully to the pious legends 
and convent annals with which the good Sisters 
may seek to edify their visitors. 

To remember that the poor-boxes found in 
charitable institutions are not put there for 
ornament. 

To thank the Sister who has conducted one 



When Visiting Convents, 73 

through a convent, and to express the pleasure 
afforded by the visit. 

For parents, relatives, and friends visiting 
children at school to positively discountenance 
all tale-bearing. 

If there is any fault to be found with the 
treatment of a pupil either in regard to disci- 
pline or class, to ask for the Superior or Direct- 
ress, and lay the complaint frankly and court- 
eously before her. 

To remember that an open complaint will be 
appreciated much more than secret fault-find- 
ing. 

To remember that there are two sides to 
every question. 

To act in a convent parlor as one would in a 
private house. 

To encourage pupils to follow the rules and 
regulations of the institution. 

To take for granted that the Superior and 
her assistants know their business and are not 
in need of unsolicited instruction. 

To provide children with proper wearing ap- 
parel. 



74 The Correct Thing 

To remember that a convent is not the place 
for fashionable attire. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To seek admission into a convent on the 
class-days, when visitors are not wanted. 

To spend the time whilst waiting in w^alking 
around the parlor, criticising the pictures, fin- 
gering the ornaments, etc. 

To say " we want to go through the house," 
as if that were a right instead of only a privilege. 

To rush ahead of the conductress and into 
rooms probably not open to visitors. 

To spend some time in a class-room disturb- 
ing the pupils and taking their minds from 
their lessons. 

To forget that loud laughter and shrill tones 
are particularly out of place in a convent. 

To ask a Sister why she became a nun, where 
she came from, what her family name was, if 
she ever wishes she were back in the world, how 
much dowry is required for entrance, if the 
novitiate is very strict, if they are allowed 
enough to eat, if she does not think that con- 



When Visiting Cofivents. 75 

vents are behind the times ; or to say that the 
convent would be much nicer if it had the 
modern improvements ; that the Blank convent 
is a far more fashionable one ; that nuns are 
only human beings after all ; that convents are 
good institutions for girls to learn their cate- 
chism, fancy-work, and penmanship in, and for 
those who do not care for a higher education ; 
to offer to send a catalogue of Clap Trap Col- 
lege so that the Sisters can cribbage some ad- 
vanced ideas ; to ask why they do not employ 
professors for music and drawing ; to say that 
one would rather be dead than be a nun, and 
to express unbounded sympathy for the mis- 
guided mortals who were ever persuaded into 
sacrificing their lives. 

To go to the other extreme. 

To indulge in rhapsodies over the amateur 
daubs found in the studio. 

To act when in the chapel as if one's knees 
were made of wood without any joints. 

To forget that in a purely charitable institu- 
tion the clasp of one's purse ought not to be like 
the mouth of a clam. 



^6 The Correct Thing 

To take one's departure without a word of 
acknowledgment as to the pleasure afforded by 
the visit. 

For parents to encourage their children in 
finding fault with their teachers or mistresses. 

To forget that the Superioress is a lady and 
entitled to the respect due a lady as well as to 
her office. 

To forget that it is dishonorable to carry 
tales out of school. 

To ask to take pupils out of the convent on 
any other than the regulation days without ex- 
ceedingly grave reasons. 

For any one to carry letters or notes, under 
any circumstances, either in or out of a con- 
vent. 

To make frequent or unnecessary visits. 



In Regard to Indulgences, 77 



THE CORRECT THING lU REGARD TO 
INDULGENCES. 

it is the Corirect Thing 

For Catholics to understand thoroughly the 
nature of indulgences. 

To know that an indulgence is the release 
from the canonical penance enjoined on the 
penitent in the early days of the Church in 
punishment for certain sins. 

That an indulgence also remits the whole or 
a part of the temporal punishment due to sin, 
either here or in purgatory. 

That Christ Himself gave the Church power 
to grant indulgences when He said to St. Peter, 
"Whatsoever thou shalt loose upon earth it 
shall be loosed also in heaven.'* 

That the source of indulgences is in the super- 
abundant merits of Our Lord, the Blessed Vir- 
gin, and the saints. 

To know that in former times sinners were 
required to do penance for a certain length of 



78 The Correct Thing 

time, as seven years, ten years, a quarantine, or 
forty days, a hundred days, etc., and that an 
indulgence for seven years, etc., means a remis- 
sion of that penance. [A quarantine means a 
penance equivalent to a Lent — seven quarantines 
mean a penance of seven Lents.] 

That the Church does not regard sin as less 
offensive now than formerly, but that she grants 
indulgences more frequently because she wishes 
to assist our weakness and to supply our insuffi- 
ciency m satisfying the divine justice for our 
transgressions. 

That indulgences are divided into two kinds, 
plenary ^nd partial. 

That a plenary indulgence remits all the tem- 
poral punishment due to sm 

That a partial indulgence remits only a part 
of the temporal punishment due to sin. 

To know that indulgences are also divided 
into perpetual indulgences and indulgences for 
only a limited time ; that they are again divided 
into local, real, and personal indulgences. 

Perpetual indulgences are granted without 
any limitation of time ; temporary indulgences 



In Regard to Indulgences, 79 

are only for a certain time ; local indulgences 
are limited to particular places ; personal in- 
dulgences are indulgences granted to particular 
persons. 

To know that a person must be in a state of 
grace before an indulgence can be obtained. 

That to gain a plenary indulgence one must 
be heartily sorry for every sin, and have no 
affection even for the smallest venial sin. 

That to gain an indulgence one must perform 
all of the works prescribed ; and that if unable to 
fulfil some of the conditions, the indulgence can 
not be gained without having the conditions 
commuted by an authorized person into some 
other good work. 

To know that an indulgence is not a pardon 
for sin either past, present, or future, but of the 
temporal punishment due to past sin, after the 
S'in is forgiven in the Sacrament of Penance. 

To know that indulgences have never been 
either bought or sold, historians (?) to the con- 
trary. 

To know that an indulgence cannot be gained 
without a sincere sorrow for sin, and therefore it 



8o The Correct Thing 

could not by any possibility be a license to 
commit sin. 

That the usual conditions for gaining an in- 
dulgence are confession, Communion joined with 
the other good works, and prayers prescribed by 
the Church. 

To know that indulgences cannot be applied 
to the souls in purgatory unless so declared. 

That it is more meritorious to apply indul- 
gences to the poor souls than to one's self. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To imagine, as some Catholics do, that an in- 
dulgence is the remission of a certain length of 
time which would otherwise have to be spent in 
purgatory. 

That it is a remission of the punishment due 
to all the sins committed during the seven or 
ten years, or whatever the time may be, speci- 
fied in the indulgence. 

To believe that popes ever sold indulgences. 

To think that one can gain an indulgence 
whilst in the state of mortal sin, or a plenary 



In Regard to Indulgences, 8i 

indulgence when one has the slightest affection 
for even a venial sin. 

To imagine that an indulgence must of neces- 
sity follow any prescribed act. 

To fail to perform some of the works pre- 
scribed and yet imagine that one has gained the 
indulgence. 

To remember that, properly, Communion 
should complete the works prescribed for an 
indulgence. 

To imagine that sin is less heinous now than 
in former days, or that the Church so regards it, 
simply because the canonical penances have 
been abrogated. 

To place any confidence in prayers found in 
Our Lord's sepulchre warranted to preserve from 
dying in an unnatural manner, and to be had 
from pious peddlers for ten cents. (There was 
no prayer found in Our Lord's sepulchre.) 

To remember that one is guilty of a grievous 
sin of superstition who keeps any such prayer 
for the purposes intended, after correction. 

All such foolish prayers should be destroyed. 



82 The Correct Thmg 



THE CORRECT THING WHEN CALLING 
ON CLERGYMEN. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that a clergyman's time is his 
gold-mine, and that no one has a right to 
trespass unduly long. 

To call during the hours set apart for visitors, 
so as to avoid taking him away from his work, 
study, or recreation. 

To rise at the entrance of a clergyman, and to 
remain standing until he gives the signal to be 
seated. 

If not invited to sit down, as may sometimes 
happen, to state one's business briefly, and with- 
draw. 

If the call is merely a friendly one, to cut it 
short if there are others waiting to see the 
pastor. 

If compelled to call at an unusual hour, meal- 
time, or late in the evening, to apologize for so 
doing and make the visit as brief as possible. 



When Calling on Clergymen. 83 

To avoid a loud tone when telling one's 
troubles to a priest, on the score both of breed- 
ing and prudence. 

For members of a parish to make New Year's 
calls during the first weeks of the New Year on 
their pastor. 

When calling on a bishop, to kneel down to 
kiss his ring and get his blessing. 

To know that there is an indulgence attached 
to kissing a bishop's ring. 

To leave one's card when calling on a clergy- 
man who is not at home, when the call is a 
friendly one or on business. 

When the call is on business of purely a per- 
sonal nature not to leave a card. 

To remember that a clergyman has the right 
to give the signal for departure if he so desires, 
and that no offence should be taken if he does 
so. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To fail to remember one's pastor in his daily 
prayers. 

To neglect to have the Holy Sacrifice of the 



84 The Correct Thing 

Mass offered at times for the repose of the 
souls of deceased clerg}': pastors, confessors, or 
directors. (How few show this mark of regard !) 

To request a priest to offer Mass for a special 
intention or object without presenting an honor- 
ary. A priest is only bound to offer Mass for a 
special intention when this honorary is paid. 

To forget that in the United States this hon- 
orary is never less than ofie dollar and may be 
any sum above this, according to one's regard 
for or obligations to the priest. 

To ask a clerg}'man to perform any service 
incompatible with his sacred calling. 

To borrow money from a clerg}'man, to ask 
him to endorse notes, or go security. A clergy- 
man is not allowed to do these things. 

To harass a clergyman for letters to officials, 
political or othens'ise, to obtain employment. 

To make long calls on busy clerg}'men. 

To call late in the evening, at meal-times, 
before Mass, or right after dinner, on a clerg}^- 
man. 

To sit down in the presence of a clerg}*man 
without being asked to do so. 



1 



When Calling on Clergymen, 85 

To selfishly keep others waiting whilst one 
enjoys a friendly chat. 

To act as if one had a first mortgage on the 
time of a clergyman, and that no apology for an 
undue intrusion is ever necessary. 

To make one's troubles audible to every one 
who may chance to be in the house at the time 
one is seeking the advice of the pastor. 

To ask the housekeeper questions about the 
regulations of the house and its expenditures. 

To spend the time whilst waiting in looking 
at the books and papers which may be in the 
room. 

To fail to send up one's name when calling on 
a clergyman. 

To enter the parlor with muddy shoes, wet 
umbrella, or lighted cigar. 



86 The Correct Thing 



IN ADDRESSING ECCLESIASTICS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To give the proper title in speaking of Church 
dignitaries. 

For Catholics living in the place where a 
bishop has jurisdiction to speak simply of *' the 
bishop/' *^ the archbishop," "the cardinal." 

For Catholics when visiting in the see of 
another bishop to speak of their own by name, 
as "Bishop Smith," or as "our bishop," or the 
"Bishop of Blankeville." 

In Europe to be very punctilious in giving the 
correct titles. 

To make use of the personal pronoun in the 
nominative case as seldom as possible in speak- 
ing of ecclesiastics. For example, " The arch- 
bishop was not feeling at all well last week ; he 
intends to go to the seashore soon," would be 
more respectful, and therefore more correct, if 
changed to " The archbishop was not feeling at 



Th Addressing Ecclesiastics, 87 

all well last w^ek ; His Grace intends to go to 
the seashore soon." 

To know that a cardinal ranks with a prince. 

An archbishop with a duke. 

A bishop with an earl. 

To know that this rank holds good even in 
Protestant countries, as is witnessed by the fact 
that the Prince of Wales has declared that 
Cardinal Manning should come next to himself 
on the Royal Commission. 

In speaking of the pope to say " His Holiness,'" 
" The Holy Father," or in personal address, 
"Your Holiness.'* 

Of a cardinal as " His Eminence," " Your 
Eminence." 

Of an archbishop as " His Grace" or " Your 
Grace." 

Of a bishop as " His Lordship" or " Your 
Lordship." 

(These titles are not in common use in the 
United States.) 

Address letters to an archbishop : 
Most Rev, (name in full), D.D., 

Archbishop of (name of place). 



88 The Correct Thing 

To a bishop: 

Right Rev. (name), D.D.^ 

Biskop of (place). 
To a rector : 

Rev. (name), 

Rector (name of church), 

Street, 
(A secular priest not a rector of a church is 
addressed as Rev. 7iame^ with name of the church 
to which he is attached.) 

To address members of religious communities 
in sacred orders as Rev. name^ then the initial 
letters designating the particular order. 

The following are the titles and initials of 
religious orders approved in the United States: 
Jesuit Fathers — S. J., meaning Society of Jesus. 
Redemptorists Fathers — C.SS.R., Congrega- 
tion of the Most Holy Redeemer. 

Dominicans — O.P., Order of Preachers. 
Franciscans — O.S.F., Order of St. Francis. 
Benedictines — O.S.B., Order of St. Benedict. 
Black Franciscans — O.M.C., Order of Minor 
Conventuals. 

Augustinians — O.S.A., Order of St, Augustine. 



In Addressing Ecclesiastics, 89 

Carmelites — O.C.C., Order of Calced Carme- 
lites. 

Servites — O.S., Order of Servites. 

Capuchins — O.M. Cap., Order of Minor 
Capuchins. 

Lazarists — CM., Congregation of the Mission. 

Passionists — C.P., Congregation of the Passion. 

Fathers of the Holy Cross — C.S.C., Congre- 
gation of the Holy Cross. 

Paulists — C.S.P., Congregation of St. Paul. 

Basilians — C.S.B., Congregation of St. Basil. 

Resurrectionists — C.R., Congregation of the 
Resurrection. 

Fathers of the Holy Ghost— C.S.Sp., Congre- 
gation of the Holy Ghost. 

Fathers of the Precious Blood — C.PP.S., 
Congregation of the Most Precious Blood. 

Fathers of St. Viatur — C.S.V., Congregation 
of St. Viatur. 

Marists — S.M., Society of Mary. 

Fathers of Mercy— S.P.M., Society of the 
Fathers of Mercy. 

Oblates — O.M.I.,Oblates of Mary Immaculate. 

Sulpitians — S.S., Saint Sulpice. 



90 The Correct Thing 

Fathers of the Society of St. Joseph. — 
Religious communities of lay persons are ajd- 
dressed Brother or Sister. — A Superior of a cow- 
vent is usually called Mother, and the Superior- 
General of an entire orde rof religious is called 
Reverend Mother. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To give a title to an ecclesiastic higher or 
lower than the one which is his due. 

To say " Your Reverence" to a bishop, or 
" Your Eminence" to an archbishop. 

To address a letter simply to ^' Bishop Smith," 
''Father Smith." 

To say " Father Bishop" or '' Mr. Bishop," or 
" Father Priest" or " Mr. Priest." 

To use a personal pronoun where the name 
or title could be substituted. 

To reveal one's ignorance of their origin by 
criticising the use of ecclesiastical titles. 

When out of the diocese in which one lives, to 
speak of the bishop of one's place of residence 
as "the bishop," because one's auditors might 
naturally suppose that the bishop of their own 
city was meant. 



For Members of Church Associations, 91 



FOR MEMBERS OP CHURCH ASSOCIA- 
TIONS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For members of church associations to com- 
ply with the rules and regulations. 

To be present if possible when meetings are 
called. 

To have a certain amount of humility in re- 
gard to one's own ability. 

To always withdraw at once from any organi- 
zation which is not working in harmony with 
the pastor of the parish. 

To refuse to accept an office if one is not 
willing and able to discharge its duties. 

To remember that everybody cannot be first. 

For sodalists to be punctual in saying their 
office. 

To approach Holy Communion on the regular 
communion-days in a body. 

For ladies to wear the veil, medal, and Sacred 
Heart badge where required to do so by the 
rules. 



92 The Correct Thing 

For gentlemen to comply with the regulations 
as regards uniforms. 

To be prompt in paying all dues. 

For members of a sewing-society to omit the 
usual quota of questionable gossip. 

For the wealthy ladies of a parish to know 
that if they hold aloof from the benevolent 
organizations the great middle class will follow 
like a flock of geese, and that the burden of the 
expense and trouble will then fall on those who 
can least afford to bear it. 

To know that there is really nothing contami- 
nating in saying a few prayers and sewing in the 
same room with women who are " not in society." 

To think more of the end to be attained than 
of the trouble in attaining it. 

To be just before being generous. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To join an association and ignore its rules. 

To be absent without sending a valid excuse 
to the secretary. 

To belong to any society or organization 
which is not approved by the pastor. 



For Members of Church Associations, 93 

To forget that wrangling and insubordination 
give scandal to the public, and that scandal is 
a sin for those who cause it. 

To forget that there is work as well as honor 
attached to an office. 

To withdraw because a perverse organization 
refuses to profit by one's superior wisdom. 

For a sodalist to approach Holy Communion 
at an earlier or later Mass than the one named 
by the director of the sodality as the one at 
which the body of sodalists should approach 
the holy table. 

To forget one's purse on Sundays when dues 
are in order. 

To go to a sewing-society solely for the 
pleasure afforded. 

For ladies of recognized position to refuse 
to lend their names to the furtherance of 
praiseworthy associations connected with their 
church. 

To serve heaven with one's hands and the 
devil with one's tongue. 

For ladies in charge of a fair to criticise the 
methods of their co-workers. 



94 The Correct Thing 

When soliciting for a fair or festival to be 
importunate in the matter of donations. 

To promise a contribution and forget to send 
it afterwards. 

For those called upon to act as if the solici- 
tors were begging for themselves instead of the 
church. 

To refuse a contribution in a discourteous 
manner. 

To leave a solicitor standing in the hall whilst 
one makes up her mind whether she will give 
anything or not. 

To give a donation as if conferring a personal 
favor on the one who solicits it. 

To preface one's donation by the remarks that 
Father Blank is always begging ; that Father 
Blank-Blank, the former pastor, thought of 
something besides money ; that one would be 
glad to get into a parish where there were no 
debts, and where priests preached on the gospel 
instead of money, — money all the time. 

To head a subscription list with a large con- 
tribution to some charity enterprise when one's 
pew rent and church dues are unpaid. 



In Business, 95 



THE CORRECT THING IN BUSINESS. 

Jt is the Correct Thing 

To act as a gentleman in a business transac- 
tion, no matter how far his associate may forget 
himself. 

To be scrupulously honest because it is right 
to be so, and not because " honesty is the best 
policy." 

To remember that all rich men are not knaves 
nor all poor ones angels. 

To make the best of one's opportunities. 

To remember that a life need not necessarily 
be a failure because it is not crowned with 
wealth. 

To be punctual to the second in keeping a 
business appointment. 

To remember that a five minutes' delay has 
sometimes turned the tide of a young man's 
destiny. 

To devote one's business hours strictly to 



g6 The Correct Thing 

business and one's time of recreation to some- 
thing else. 

To pay a good man what his services are 
worth, and not merely the minimum at whicL 
they can be obtained. 

To avoid all misrepresentation in a business 
transaction. 

To receive every one courteously, whether 
rich or poor, whom business brings to one's 
office. 

To avoid all flippancy in a business transac- 
tion. 

To remember that both master and men are 
subject to the same laws of right and wrong. 

For business men to remember that a humane 
and considerate treatment of their employes en- 
sures the respect of the general public as well 
as the approval of their own conscience. 

To give a reproof, where necessary, in private. 

For salesmen to remember that they are paid 
to wait upon customers, and are expected to act 
as gentlemen whether a purchase is made or not. 

To remember that a frowning demeanor does 
not always imply a dignified one by any means. 



In Business, 97 

For lawyers and doctors to remember that 
professional secrets are matters of honor, the 
betrayal of which, under any circumstance, would 
bring upon themselves the condemnation of the 
whole community. 

For professional and business men to dress at 
all times as gentlemen. 

For sorely-tried business men to remember 
that book-agents and peddlers are human, and 
sometimes reduced gentlefolk, and to therefore 
be as lenient as possible. 

To hold one's word as sacred as one's bond. 

To avoid all transactions that are classed in 
lump as shady. 

To remember that adulation to power and 
arrogance to poverty mark a plebeian in mind 
as well as in origin. 

To be manly at all times. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

For a man to think that he can be a gentleman 
in the drawing-room and a boor in his office. 

To consider ignorance in another as a warrant 
for one's own imposition upon him. 



98 The Correct Thing 

To question without good reason the business 
integrity of a man who grew suddenly rich, or 
to think that poverty is always a mark of up- 
rightness and honesty and never of stupidity 
and want of business training. 

To forget that in these days of gigantic in- 
vestments, silver mines, railroads, western booms, 
and Yankee pluck, there is always an opportunity 
for the " hundredth man " to become rich. 

To forget that fortune knocks once at every 
man's door, and sometimes only once. 

To think that a fortune is necessary to hap- 
piness. 

To forget that many of the world's greatest 
men died poor. 

To forget that prudence as well as courtesy 
demands that one be punctual in keeping en- 
gagements. 

To form irregular business habits. 

To talk ^^ shop " in society. 

To devote one's whole life to business, to the 
neglect of spiritual and mental concerns. 

To forget that employes when tempted into 
dishonesty sometimes salve their conscience 



In Business, 99 

with the thought of the bad example set by 
their employers. 

To forget that money paid in salaries to de- 
serving men is always a good investment. 

To be a Shylock in demanding the whole of 
one's bond. 

To think that misrepresentation in a business 
transaction is not a first cousin to stealing. 

To have one code of manners for the rich 
and another for the poor. 

To think that one's good manners which are 
only veneered will not break some day when 
least expected or desired. 

To act as if might made right. 

For a man in society to imagine that the girl 
he may desire to marry is not perfectly familiar 
with his business reputation. 

To think that a loud reproof in public is ever 
productive of any good. 

To imagine that frigidity and intellect are 
synonymous terms. 

To forget that quack doctors and pettifogging 
lawyers are known by a lack of honor, honesty, 
and integrity more than by a lack of ability. 



loo The Correct Thing 

For business and professional men to imitate 
gamblers, jockeys, and dudes in the matter of 
dress. 

To think that antiquity in clothes adds 
dignity to one's profession. 

To forget that agents sometimes carry articles 
that are worth purchasing. 

To make use of technicalities to escape from 
one's just obligations. 

To forget that one's shady transactions have 
an unfortunate habit of getting into the news- 
papers. 

To imagine that a crime ever escapes unpun- 
ished. 

To forget that ill-gotten gains will turn the 
downiest couch into a bed of thorns at the hour 
of death. 

To forget that everybody admires a manly 
man. 



For Business Women. loi 



FOR BUSINESS WOMEN 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that work is not degradation. 

That idleness under certain circumstances 
may be. 

That a turn in the wheel of fortune is every 
day sending patricians to toil and plebeians to 
ease. 

That the Blessed Virgin, the descendant of 
kings, the Mother of the King of kings, did not 
disdain either poverty or work. 

That the world respects a woman who re- 
spects herself. 

To be strictly on time in the school-room, 
office, or wherever one's duties call. 

For a working-woman to remember that the 
time for which she is paid belongs to her em- 
ployers. 

To claim no indulgence on the score of sex. 

To accept it gratefully if it is given. 



I02 Tke Correct Thing 

To remember that employers as a rule prefer 
to discharge a woman rather than find fault 
with her. 

To remember that prudence, patience, and 
perseverance are virtues particularly desirable 
in a business-woman. 

To work only under reputable and honorable 
employers. 

To insist at all times upon the respect due a 
lady. 

To let one's conduct deserve it. 

To be courteous and considerate of one's co- 
laborers. 

To remember that courtesy to business asso- 
ciates does no4: imply a necessity of receiving 
them as friends if they are uncongenial, or one's 
social inferiors. 

To be scrupulously neat and severely plain in 
attire. 

To avoid jewelry, striking colors, pronounced 
styles, on the score of good taste as *^-ell as 
prudence. 

To take proper care of one's physical health 
so as to avoid the " breakdown" which unfortu- 



^ For Business Women, 103 

nately usually overtakes the woman who is 
steadily employed. 

To remember that one cannot work and be 
" in society" at the same time. 

To find temporal happiness in home and 
friends, in books, music, art, flowers, and the 
pleasures which may be enjoyed in obscurity, 
and not sigh for social amusements beyond 
one's reach. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To prefer debt, difficulties, and starvation to 
work. 

To imagine that all women of wealth and 
position have blue blood in their veins, and all 
women who work but the ordinary fluid. 

For a woman to enter the bread-winning 
arena unless poverty compels her to do so. 

To forget that some avocations are consid- 
ered lady-like and others the reverse. 

To get married solely to escape poverty and 
work. 

To leave one's conscience at home when set- 
ting out for one's daily labors. 



I04 The Correct Thing 

To imagine that God ever intended a woman 
to perform the same work as a man. 

To dress in a manner incompatible with one's 
salary. 

To be careless about one's personal appear- 
ance. 

To imagine a costume cannot be tasteful and 
becoming without being very expensive. 

To prefer two shabby gowns to one good one. 

To say that one works for a living because 
one prefers to do so, and not because there is 
any want of the money earned, for everybody 
knows that such a statement is a rank falsehood. 

To imagine that it would be to one's credit if 
it were true, since some other woman who 
needs the money would be kept out of the 
position. 

For women who merely wish to make some 
pin-money to work for less than the regular 
rates, since by so doing they reduce the wages 
of those who must earn their daily bread. 

For women in comfortable circumstances to 
imagine that there is nothing dishonest and dis- 
honorable in sending embroidery, paintings, and 



For Business Women, 105 

fancy articles to be disposed of at the Ex- 
changes intended only to help those really in 
need of such assistance. 

For women in general to forget that man's 
inhumanity to man is sometimes but a shadow 
compared to woman's inhumanity to woman. 



[o6 2 he Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING FOR OFFICE- 
HOLDERS. 

It is the Corirect Thing 

To remember that man was made for the 
office, not the office for man. 

To do nothing as a politician that one would 
scorn to do in private life. 

To know that the man who makes his office 
the stepping-stone to wealth and advancement 
for all his relatives and friends, deserves, and 
generally gets, the opprobrium of all honorable 
people. 

To remember that the maxim "A public 
office is a public trust " is not altogether ob- 
solete except among professional politicians. 

To pledge nothing as a candidate which one 
is not prepared to fulfil when in office. 

To remember that the sins of all the genera- 
tions since Adam are visited by the opposition 
press on the heads of candidates for office. 



For Office-Holders. 107 

To be as affable and as concerned about the 
life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness of one's 
constituents after election as one was before. 

To remember that there is no office in the 
world worth the sacrifice of honor and honesty. 

For an office-holder to be as anxious about his 
public work as he was about his private con- 
cerns. 

To remember that his duty is to the public at 
large, who pay the taxes, and not to the party 
that elected him. 

To devote his time to the discharge of official 
duties, and not in ladling out spoils to political 
henchmen. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To imagine that offices were created by 
benevolent statesmen to give employment to 
professional politicians. 

To forget that popular elections sometimes 
lack a good deal of being popular. 

To imagine that in electing one man to office 
the people intended to also elect all his 
" brothers and his cousins and his uncles," etc. 



io8 The Correct Thing 

To imagine that a man is not answerable as a 
man for sins committed as an office-holder. 

To enter politics if one's past history will not 
bear a calcium light. 

To win votes under false pretences and 
through misrepresentations. 

To imagine that " mud-throwing" is a digni- 
fied or gentlemanly way of conducting a cam- 
paign. 

To use one's office for gain other than in a 
legitimate way. 

To talk about the " brotherhood of man'* at 
mass meetings and ignore the needs of the 
people when in office. 

To prefer re-election to office to the welfare 
of the people at large and the approval of one's 
own conscience. 



For a Citizen, 109 



THE CORRECT THING FOR A CITIZEN. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For a citizen to remember that he owes a duty 
to the community in which he lives. 

To know the difference between statesman- 
ship and political wire-pulling. 

To remember that a trickster holding office is 
a standing reproach to the community which 
permitted his election. 

To know that a bad law does not bind in 
conscience. 

Before saying too much about the State to 
have a fair idea of the men who happen, for all 
practical purposes, to be " the State." 

To remember that parents and citizens as in- 
dividuals have certain functions as individuals 
which cannot be thrown off upon the State. 

To let love of country be second only to love 
of God. 

To know that the very least a loyal son of his 
country can do is to cast his vote for good men, 



no The Correct Thing 

and to help elect statesmen and gentlemen, and 
not ward politicians and tricksters. 

To remember that a reputable citizen who ac- 
cepts office deserves the gratitude of every other 
reputable citizen. 

To take a patriotic pride in the prosperity of 
one's country, one's State, and one's city. 

To contribute cheerfully to all public enter- 
prises. 

To remember that a bad Christian never made 
a good citizen. 

To answer in the negative Scott's immortal 
question: 

' * Breathes there a man with soul so dead 
Who never to himself has said 
This is my own, my native land ? " 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

For a man to think that he can rightfully live 
only for himself. 

To claim the benefits of citizenship, and to 
shirk its burdens. 

To think that rights have not their corre- 
sponding obligations. 



For a Citizen, 1 1 1 

To imagine that it is unworthy of a gentle- 
man to take an interest in politics. 

To think that a man entitled to the ballot, 
who holds aloof from the polls and then talks 
about political corruption, is not partly to blame 
for such a state of affairs. 

To forget that in some instances " the State," 
which a few would have us believe is infallible, 
is composed, as far as real power is concerned, 
of many political tricksters who use public trusts 
and public funds to further personal and party 
ends. 

To forget that good men sometimes break bad 
laws. 

To talk about political corruption when one 
does nothing to mend the matter. 

To forget that the " State" was made for man, 
not man for the State. 

To imagine that admiration and approval are 
acceptable substitutes for money in public and 
charitable enterprises. 



112 The Correct Thhig 



THE COERECT THING IN SOCIETY. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To discharge one's social obligations faithfully. 

To pay especial deference to elderly people 
wherever met. 

To be punctilious in calling upon and send- 
ing invitations to one's friends who have be- 
come reduced in circumstances, otherwise one 
lays herself liable to the suspicion that she values 
her friends for their wealth and social position. 

To seek the society of those only who are 
congenial, since one has a right to choose one's 
friends. 

To be pleasant to every one whom one acci- 
dentally meets. 

To remember that ladies of assured position 
can afford to be democratic in the selection of 
their guests if they so desire, and that it is only 
the parvenues who are constantly revising their 
calling lists. 

For those in society to observe social usages. 

To remember that there are a great many 



In Society, 113 

people who, like the old Israelites, worship the 
golden calf. 

To make a point of saying a few pleasant 
words to those who seem to be neglected at a 
large reception. 

For kind-hearted Catholic matrons to chap- 
eron motherless girls to places of amusement. 

To remember that people of the highest rank 
are generally the least haughty. 

For every well-born, well-bred American to 
act as if she felt herself the equal of every other 
well-bred, well-born American, regardless of for- 
tune. 

To remember that snobs and parvenues would 
not receive St. Peter himself unless he came 
with the proper credentials. 

To get rid of undesirable acquaintances in 
some other manner besides the " cut direct." 

To have many acquaintances, but few friends. 

To refuse to introduce people who belong to 
different social grades. 

To consider a friend's roof as sufficient intro- 
duction at the time. 

To assist cheerfully in affairs gotten up for 



114 The Correct Thing 

charity through motives of charity, and not 
merely because it is fashionable to do so. 

For ladies in society to use their position to 
further charitable aims. 

For the rich to remember that money from 
them would be more acceptable than encourag- 
ing words. 

For the poor to be generous with their sym- 
pathy and praise. 

To remember that men may have been born 
equal at the time of the Declaration of Inde- 
pendence, but that they did not remain so. 
That women never were. 

To understand that in the absence of a 
written peerage, social position in America is a 
good deal a matter of geography. That in 
some places birth, breeding, and beauty are the 
determining factors ; in most places it is money, 
and in some instances it is mere luck, and that 
therefore a high place is too uncertain to run 
any spiritual risks to obtain. 

To refuse to know people who have forfeited 
their right in respectable society, whatever may 
be their position. 



In Society, 115 

To think twice twenty times before uttering a 
word that would tarnish a girl's reputation. 

To remember that legacy hunters are some- 
times disappointed. 

That rich relations have, as a rule, an average 
amount of sense, and are generally good readers 
of character. 

To have a convenient memory at times. 

To remember that money given in charity is 
on interest in heaven. 

To entertain in accordance with one's means. 

For a matron to refuse to present a man whom 
she would not care to have meet her own 
daughters, to the daughters of other people. 

To be conspicuous by one's absence from in- 
delicate or suggestive plays. 

To be blind at times in art galleries. 

To refuse to discuss certain books, certain 
plays, and certain pictures with gentlemen. 

For both maids and matrons to understand 
that some decollete gowns are correct, some 
are immodest, and some are indecent. 

To remember that lace, gauze, and tulle are 
unfailing friends to both the stout woman and 



ii6 The Correct Thing 

to the thin one : to the first on the score of 
modesty, to the second on that of beauty. 

For a thin woman to understand that angles 
unadorned are not adorned the most. 

For a Catholic to refuse to dance round 
dances if she has conscientious scruples in the 
matter. 

To understand that some dances were never 
intended to be danced in refined circles. 

To refuse to dance with a man whose reputa- 
tion is not above reproach, no matter under 
whose roof he happens to be. 

For a gentleman to be moderate in his use of 
wine at a party or reception. 

To remember that a man who feels in the 
slightest degree "his cups" has no place in a 
social gathering and should take his departure 
on short order. 

For a Catholic to refuse chicken salad and 
other meats at a party supper after twelve 
o'clock on Thursday night. 

To say the principal part of one's regular 
prayers before going to an evening entertain- 
ment. 



« 



In Society. 117 

To carefully refrain from doing or saying any- 
thing that would wound the feelings or reputa- 
tion of another. 

To let one's good manners be the natural out- 
come of a good heart, and not merely a veneer- 
ing of social form. 

For an uninteresting girl to remember that 
men are not usually actuated by motives of 
philanthropy in going to a party, and that if she 
objects to being merely a looker-on in Vienna 
she must make herself attractive. 

For good-hearted gentlemen to pay some 
attention to " wall-flowers," both as a courtesy 
to their hostess and as a kindness to their sisters 
in Mother Eve. 

For the rich to spend their money to give 
pleasure to their friends. 

For a Catholic girl to be a model in society to 
all others. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To give up the greater part of one's time to 
social duties. 



ii8 The Correct Thing 

To reserve one's most winning manners for 
the rich and those in high places. 

To forget in prosperity the friends in ad- 
versity. 

To forget that old friends, like old wines, are 
generally the best. 

To toady to wealth, to be supercilious to 
poverty. 

To be too familiar with equals. 

To forget that an angel was once entertained 
unawares. 

To be eccentric in regard to conforming to 
social usages. 

To be ashamed of one's religion. 

To introduce religious discussions in society. 

To be a self-constituted Little Sister of the 
Rich. 

To ignore the presence of a stranger or a " wall 
flower" at a reception. 

In making up an opera party to include only 
the reigning belles. 

For a girl to introduce the stupid men to her 
friends and to keep the agreeable ones for her- 
self. 



In Society, 119 

To remember the faults and forget the virtues 
of one's friends. 

To forget to be careful in forming acquaint- 
ances, more careful in selecting friends, and 
most careful in choosing confidants. 

For a girl to have secrets she would not care 
to tell her mother or guardian. 

For a girl's conduct, however harmless, to be 
such as would call out unpleasant comment. 

To patronize only charitable affairs that are 
fashionable and leave the others to take care of 
themselves. 

To make a charity entertainment the occasion 
of "envy, malice, and all uncharitableness." 

To think more of one's own part than of the 
object to be attained. 

For a girl to take all the pleasure and credit 
in a charitable entertainment, and shirk all the 
work. 

For a woman to try to make a charity organi- 
zation the stepping-stone to social advancement. 

To speak on all occasions possible of *^ my 
third cousin, Mr. Croesus," and to ignore the 
existence of "' my uncle, Mr. Poorman." 



T20 The Correct Thing 

For a woman in moderate circumstances to 
try to entertain on the same scale as her wealthy 
friends. 

Far people to live beyond their means. 

For a young man working on a salary to 
emulate the example of his wealthier asso- 
ciates. 

For a woman to cheat the grocer in order to 
dress her daughters in silk attire and a sealskin 
jacket. 

For a young man to spend half his salary for 
flowers and opera tickets for a rich girl, who may 
accept the attentions gracefully, but will be very 
far from accepting the man who offers them. 

For a girl to accept valuable presents from 
gentlemen. 

For a consistent Catholic to permit any atten- 
tions whatever from a divorced man, and only 
what is conscientiously proper from any married 
man. 

To devote more time to social pleasures than 
to religious and home duties. 

To think that a few prayers hurried through 



In Society, 121 

at three o'clock in the morning, when one is half 
asleep, constitute a proper night prayer. 

For a girl to be on the constant look-out for 
a rich husband. She is generally disappointed. 

For a woman to ignore the opinion of her 
husband, father, or brother, in regard to the 
proper cut of an evening bodice. 

To wear an immodest gown because somebody 
else happens to do so. 

To call a girl who refuses to dance round 
dances a prude. 

To dance so much as to injure one's health. 

For those who practise the old-fashioned 
custom of keeping open house on New Year's 
day to offer wine to their callers. 

To FORGET THAT TIME IS BUT A PRELUDE 
TO ETERNITY. 



122 The Correct Thing 



IN CONVERSATION. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that, according to the old phi- 
losophers, speech is silver, and silence is golden. 

To remember that those who think twice 
before they speak, and in some instances do not 
speak at all, save themselves many after regrets. 

To remember that mere talk lacks a great 
deal of being conversation. 

To remember that personalities are ill-bred. 

To listen respectfully to old people and those 
whose position entitles them to consideration. 

To avoid talking scandal and gossip. 

To avoid coarseness in conversation as one 
would the leprosy. 

To remember that stabbing one's body is not 
half so great a crime as stabbing one's reputa- 
tion. 

To remember the Golden Rule and do unto 
others as you would have them do unto you, 



In Conversation, 123 

when tempted to repeat an ill-natured or com- 
promising bit of gossip. 

To remember that women, old and young, 
married and single, who indulge in indelicate 
and coarse expressions, double entendres, and 
select topics for conversation which they would 
blush to have overheard by gentlemen, have for- 
feited all right to the title of ladies, to say noth- 
ing of that of Christians. 

To manifest marked displeasure when indeli- 
cate and immodest subjects are broached. 

To frown down all mention even of salacious 
books and newspaper scandals. Good breeding 
as well as delicacy requires this. 

To speak deferentially to superiors, kindly to 
inferiors, and courteously to equals. 

To remember that if you cannot keep your 
own secrets, it is hardly fair to expect your 
friends to keep them for you. 

To remember that slander is a grievous sin. 

To remember that religious discussions in 
general conversation are usually productive of 
but little good. 

To explain patiently, clearly, and lucidly any 



124 The Correct Thing 

point connected with the Church to those who 
are sincere in seeking information. 

If unable to give a clear answer, to say so at 
once, and not run the risk of giving a false im- 
pression in what might prove a serious matter. 

Decline all arguments with a professional in- 
fidel, 

'* A man convinced against his will 
Remains of the same opinion still." 

To correct patiently and courteously any mis- 
statement made in regard to the Church or her 
history. 

For a person who mingles much in cultivated 
society to be familiar with the Catholic position 
in regard to the leading questions of the day, 
and to be ** loaded and primed " conversationally 
when the occasion demands. 

To remain always calm, cool, and collected in 
an argument. 

For a Catholic to offer to loan suitable books 
to one seeking information, and then decline, if 
he feels like it, any further discussion at the 
time. 

To practise Hannibal's tactics and carry the 



In Conversation, 125 

war into Africa, in an argument; in other words, 
to ask an explanation of the creed of an oppo- 
nent rather than spend all one's force in defend- 
ing one's own. 

To remember that a fool can ask more ques- 
tions in a minute than a wise man can answer in 
an hour. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To keep one's tongue in constant use. 

To talk whether one understands the subject 
of conversation or not. 

To forget that a good listener is appreciated 
quite as much as a good conversationalist. 

To be an animated newspaper. 

To talk of private affairs in public places. 

To laugh at coarse jests, and to take part or 
to listen to indelicate conversations. 

To repeat scandal. 

To make thoughtless remarks as to the age, past 
history, social position, family skeletons, finan- 
cial embarrassments, absurdity in dress, peculiar- 
ity in speech or behavior, or anything which 
would wound the feelings of another. 



126 The Correct Thing 

To argue in society. 

To meekly acquiesce, for fear of giving 
offense, to a slander or misstatement in regard 
to the Church. 

To speak in a loud tone. 

To get unduly excited over an argument. 

To discuss religious questions flippantly. 

To attempt to explain to an opponent what 
one does not thoroughly understand one's self. 

To **pump " children and servants in order to 
find out the private affairs of one's neighbors. 

To forget that a piece of scandal put in cir- 
culation at a sewing society or an afternoon tea 
is harder to recall than a bag of feathers scat- 
tered to the four winds in a Kansas cyclone. 

To damn a rival with faint praise. 

To use slang. 

To speak disrespectfully of the religious con- 
victions of any one in his presence. 

To criticise clergymen and religious. In the 
first place, there is danger of giving scandal; and 
in the second, it is a want of Christian charity 
to hold up the faults of those who have sacri- 
ficed their lives for the salvation of souls. 



In Conversation, 127 

To forget that it is only vulgar, ill-bred people 
who talk scandal, gossip, unkind personalities, 
on indelicate topics, slang, in a loud voice, are 
careless of the feelings of others, and bore 
people with arguments and bluster. 

To forget that cultivated and Christian people 
are affable, amiable, elegant, refined, delicate, 
considerate, and pleasing in conversation. 

To forget that books, music, art, social hap- 
penings, political complications, ethical ques- 
tions, scientific researches, fashions, household 
decoration, travel, projects and plans, sanitary- 
improvements, charitable institutions, literary 
and social clubs, fads, fancies, and foibles afford 
plenty of material for harmless and instructive 
conversation. 

To forget that an account will have to be one 
day rendered of every idle word. 



128 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN MATTERS OP 
DRESS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To dress according to one's means. 

To avoid all extremes and eccentricities in 
dress. 

To remember that neatness, scrupulous clean- 
liness, and a perfect fit are the fundamentals in 
a proper attire. 

To pay dressmakers and seamstresses a fair 
price for their work. 

To pay them promptly. 

To avoid conspicuous attire on the street. 

To dress in society as the occasion demands. 

For rich people to wear costly apparel. 

For poor ones and those in moderate circum- 
stances to avoid unpleasant comment by wearing 
inexpensive gowns in which good taste and a 
graceful style compensate for the want of cost. 

To remember that one of the marks of a lady 
is to dress as one. 



1 



In Matters of Dress, 129 

To keep one's clothes in perfect order. 

To make a liberal use of soap and water. 

To remember that male cranks wear their 
hair long and female cranks theirs short. 

To leave rouge to the green-room where it is 
a necessary adjunct, and to the women who 
have no reputation to be compromised. 

To remember that tight lacing, and any device 
of the toilet which injures the health, is not 
only bad taste, but is a positive sin. 

To remember that no lady, to say nothing of 
a Catholic worthy of the name, will wear a 
gown cut immodestly low. 

To dress becomingly in the home circle. 

To remember that the body is the temple of 
the Holy Ghost, and is therefore worthy of 
proper care. 

To THINK LESS OF ADORNING THE BODY THAN 
THE SOUL. 

It is Not the Coirrect Thing 

For a woman to spend more than she can 
afford on dress. 

For a woman to spend the greater part of her 



130 The Correct Thing 

time shopping, studying fashion-plates, devising 
costumes, and sewing. 

For a woman who can afford better to wear 
shabby gowns. 

To follow an ugly and unbecoming fashion. 

For poor women to try to rival rich ones in 
matters of dress. 

To haggle over a reasonable price for dress- 
making and sewing. 

To show disrespect to a hostess by appearing 
at her entertainments in unsuitable apparel. 

To wear showy and expensive costumes at 
church. 

To wear shabby costumes at church, as if any- 
thing were good enough for the house of God. 

To wear torn stockings, ripped gloves, shoes 
with buttons off, gowns in need of dusting and 
renovating, hats out of date and unbecoming, 
soiled collars, cuffs, or ruching, and to make 
a liberal use of pins. 

To emulate the Indian in his dislike to a 
bath. 

To use rouge on the cheeks, ink on the eye- 
brows, or blondine on the hair. 



In Matters of Dress. 131 

To use powder too freely. Its proper use is 
merely to take the shiny appearance off the face 
after it has been washed, or when going out in 
the wind and sun to prevent chapping. 

To forget that an immodest gown is a mark 
of low breeding. 

To devote the greater part of one's time to 
the consideration of clothes. 

To think that anything is good enough to 
wear at home. 

For a woman to appear in the home circle in 
a slouchy wrapper, old slippers, hair dishevelled, 
bangs in curl-papers, or in a worn-out reception 
gown sadly in need of repairs. 

To forget that art in many instances may 
remedy the defects of nature. 

To let vanity be the motive in taking proper 
care of the body. 



132 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN THE STREET. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To appear dressed neatly, soberly, and be- 
comingly on the street 

To avoid every act calculated to attract at- 
tention. 

To return all salutations courteously. 

To avoid what is called a street flirtation as 
one would the plague. 

To remember that laughter and loud tones 
are particularly unbecoming on the street. 

To remember that others have the right of 
way as well as one's self, and that it is ill-bred to 
try to monopolize the whole pavement. 

To refrain from staring at the passers-by. 

To remember that no lady is ever seen talk- 
ing on the street-corner. 

To remember that the street is not a dining- 
room for the consumption of candy, peanuts, 
etc. 

For a younger person to give precedence to 
an older one. 



In the Street, 133 

It is Not the Coirrect Thing 

To wear flashy, showy costumes, jewelry, or 
rouge on the street. 

To be dressed so shabbily as to attract atten- 
tion. 

To be defective in eyesight when a poor ac- 
quaintance is passing by. 

For a girl to try to attract a gentleman's at- 
tention. 

To speak to some one across the street. 

To hold an umbrella so that its drippings will 
fall upon one's companion or the passing pedes- 
trians. 

For three or four girls to walk abreast like a 
detachment of militia, to the inconvenience of 
others who have a right to the street. 

For a lady to take a gentleman's arm in the 
day-time unless it has been sleeting. 

For a girl to giggle, talk slang, or discuss 
private affairs on the street. 

To laugh at the defects or the peculiarities of 
persons seen on the street. 

To show ill-temper if one is jostled by the 
crowd. 



134 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN THE STREET 
CARS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For a lady to thank a gentleman who relin- 
quishes his seat for her in a low, well-bred, cour- 
teous tone of voice. 

To occupy no more space than is necessary 
in a crowded car. 

For a lady courteously to refuse a seat offered 
by an elderly gentleman or a tired workingman. 

For a lady to offer her seat to an elderly 
person, an invalid, or a woman with a baby. 

To have the fare ready so as not to keep the 
conductor waiting. 

To avoid audible comments on one's fellow- 
passengers. 

For those nearest the box to offer to deposit 
the fare on cars where the company is too poor 
to provide conductors. 

To be ready with a gracious apology if one is 
compelled to stumble over others in reaching 
a seat. 



In the Street Cars. 135 

It is Not the Corirect Thing 

For a lady to flounce into a vacated seat as if 
it were her right, with an inaudible " thank you," 
or none at all, to the gentleman who voluntarily 
relinquished it for her. 

For a lady to take possession of a seat vacated 
for another one. 

For a young lady of leisure to remain selfishly 
seated when weary working-people are standing, 
exhausted by their day's labor. 

To fumble through pocket and purse for the 
desired fare instead of having it conveniently 
ready. 

To crowd and push against others. 

To "look daggers'* at one who unavoidably 
steps on one's toes or gown. 

To read letters in a street-car, unless it is 
desired to have others acquainted w^ith their 
contents. 

To ridicule fellow-passengers. 

To mention names in a conversation on the 
cars. 



136 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN SHOPPING. 

It is the Correct Thing 

For a person to spend a reasonable length of 
time looking at the articles displayed in the 
stores without purchasing anything, if she finds 
nothing to suit her fancy or her purse. 

To ask politely to be shown what one is in 
search of, as it is the business of the employees 
to wait upon customers. 

To take as much time as is necessary in 
making a purchase. 

To remember that it is the salesmen's busi- 
ness to sell goods, and that they are therefore 
not likely to be disinterested advisers. 

To comply with the regulations of the shop 
in regard to the exchanging of goods. 

To avoid a supercilious air in dealing with 
the salespeople. 

To avoid familiarities in manner or speech in 
dealing with them. 



In Shopping. 137 

To say " thank you'* at the conclusion of a 
transaction. 

To thank courteously the salesman who has 
been waiting on one where no purchase has 
been made. 

To avoid making the aisles of the big stores 
the rendezvous for meeting all one's acquain- 
tances. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To make a tour of the shops, pulling down 
and examining goods, pricing articles, and taking 
up the time of the salesmen, when there is no 
intention of purchasing anything. 

To haggle over the price of articles. 

To tell the salesman that the same thing can 
be purchased cheaper at another store. If that 
is the case, quietly say that the article is not 
what is wanted (as it is not, at that price), and 
then go to the more reasonable shop and make 
the desired purchase. 

To so far forget the demeanor of a lady as 
to indulge in contradictions as to the merits of 
goods with the salesman. 



138 The Correct Thing 

To forget that courtesy is due to a working- 
woman as much as to any one else. 

To make a practice of dropping into stores 
where tea and other refreshments are being 
served. These are intended for the customers 
and not for the general public. 

To ask a lady returned from a shopping ex- 
pedition the prices of the various articles pur- 
chased. She may have objections to telling 
their cost. 

To tell falsehoods about the cost of an article. 



When Travelling, 139 



THE CORRECT THING WHEN TRAVEL- 
LING. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that one of the surest tests of 
a lady is her ability to travel as one. 

To be properly attired when travelling. 

To avoid wearing garments that are con- 
spicuous in any way. 

To remember that fellow-passengers have 
rights as well as one's self. 

To open or close a window if the doing so 
would add to the comfort of others. 

For a lady to travel alone in America if 
necessity demands it. 

For a young lady to refuse decidedly and at 
once to enter into any sort of conversation with 
obtrusive strangers. 

For a lady to answer courteously any ques- 
tions which may be put to her by an elderly 
person. 



140 The Correct Thing 

To assist in any way in her power a country- 
woman, or one unused to travelling. 

To provide one's self with time-tables, maps, 
etc., so as to be independent in the matter of 
information in regard to the route. 

To make the best of the situation if com- 
pelled to share one's seat. 

To remember that the porter in a sleeping-car 
can only make up one berth at a time, regard- 
less of his good intentions or tips. 

To explain lucidly and decidedly, but without 
any show of temper or ill-breeding, a mistake or 
imposition of which one has been the victim. 

For a girl to remember that giggling, loud 
laughter, shrill tones, personalities, family history 
made public, tete-a*tetes with strange young 
men, excite the disgust of everybody on the 
train with her as well as of the very ones who 
help her to make a fool of herself. 

To remember that one is not excused from 
night and morning prayers simply because one 
happens to be on a journey. 

To remember that other travellers have as 
much right to the dressing-room as one's self, 



When Travelling. 141 

and therefore it should not be occupied for an 
indefinite length of time. 

To take one's good manners and Christian 
principles along with one, instead of packing 
them away with one's wardrobe. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To think that one can have one code of man- 
ners when travelling and another for home use. 

For a lady to wear silk gowns, gay colors, 
flaring hats, or other conspicuous apparel when 
travelling. 

To remember that a true lady is happiest 
when attracting the least attention. 

To selfishly open a window when a person 
with asthma or consumption is sitting opposite. 

For a lady to make a practice of going on 
long journeys alone. 

For a young lady who respects herself to 
permit any advances from strange young men. 

To answer snappishly, or not all, questions 
politely put to one. 

To be constantly troubling the conductor 
with questions as to the route, etc. 



142 The Correct TJmig 

To make fellow-passengers nervous by talk- 
ing audibly about wrecks, explosions, etc. 

To think that one can do with impunity when 
abroad what one would not do at home. 

To look daggers at a person compelled to 
share one's seat. The stranger probably regrets 
the intrusion quite as much as one's self. 

To think that one is entitled to a whole 
section who has only paid for one berth. 

To make a circus of one's self and one's 
temper, for the benefit of disgusted or amused 
fellow-travellers, over mistakes and misunder- 
standings. 

To forget that others besides poor Goldsmith 
think that " the loud laugh bespeaks a vacant 
mind." 

For a girl tempted into conversations with 
strange men to forget Weller's advice on matri- 
mony, " Don't." 

To think that the law of abstinence from 
meat on Friday is abrogated simply because one 
happens to be travelling. 

To scatter the debris of one's lunch around 
the seat to the annoyance and disgust of others. 



When Travelling, 143 

To lock one's self in the dressing-room and 
proceed to make one's toilet as leisurely as if 
at home, regardless of others, who have some 
excuse for wishing their selfish companion in 
Timbuctoo or the tropics. 

To wear one's shabbiest manners along with 
one's shabbiest gown when travelling. 



144 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN THE HOME 
CIRCLE. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that every one who has a 
happy home, be it humble or grand, is rich. 

To be courteous, considerate, affable, and 
entertaining at home as well as in society. 

For a man to be as attentive to his wife as 
he was to his fiance. 

For a woman to be as fascinating after mar- 
riage as she was before. 

For a man to consider that money spent to 
give pleasure to his wife and family is money 
well spent. 

For a woman to understand that on her 
shoulders usually rests the burden of domestic 
economy, and to shape her expenditures in 
accordance with her income. 

For a man to really be a woman's intellectual 
superior if he wants to be considered so. 

For a wife to understand that a woman in a 



In the Home Circle. 145 

shabby gown, with untidy hair, dull eyes^ un- 
cared-for complexion, and a peevish manner, is 
not usually regarded as the most pleasing orna- 
ment at the head of a man's table. 

For a man to bear in mind that no woman is 
going to love a man very deeply whom she 
cannot respect. 

For a woman to remember that a smile of 
welcome, a becoming toilet, an inviting home, 
a well-cooked and daintily-served dinner, are 
no more than what is due to a man who has 
worked hard all day for her. 

For a man to speak of having won his wife's 
affections and not of her as having won his, no 
matter what may be the facts in the case. 

For a woman to remember that it is those 
calm, even-tempered, prosaic, common-sense 
sort of women who are the real masters in the 
home, no matter who enjoys the nominal honor, 
and that those who are " bundles of nerves and 
electricity " only wear themselves out with their 
storms and tears without gaining anything, un- 
less it be a bit of lofty advice. 

For both husband and wife to remember that 



146 The Correct Thing 

the marriage vows are solemn things which 
should be solemnly kept. 

For both to " bear and forbear " with each 
other. 

To remember that a home without God can- 
not long be a happy one. 

For a man who remains out at his " club " 
until after twelve o'clock at night to expect to 
find his wife in temper and tears when he finally 
reaches home. 

For attractive young wives to remember that 
a "married flirt" always brings upon herself 
the condemnation of society if the condemna- 
tion of her own conscience does not keep her 
within the bounds of propriety. 

For a woman to make home pleasant. 

For a man to show his appreciation of her 
efforts. 

For every member of a household to re- 
member that punctuality is a virtue to be 
practised daily, and in small matters as well as 
in the more important ones. 

For every room in the house to be as attrac- 
tive in its way as the parlor. 



In the Home Circle. 147 

To know that open-handed hospitality is 
generally rewarded by the happiness afforded, 
even in this world. 

To know that great men and noble women 
are generally reared in happy homes. 

To remember that courtesy, patience, con- 
sideration, affability, self-sacrifice, sympathy, are 
some of the virtues to be practised in the home 
circle. 

To have family prayers in common where 
possible. 

For every member of a household to consider 
morning prayer as much of a duty as prayers at 
night. 

To be punctilious about saying grace before 
meals, and returning thanks afterwards. 

To let no unpleasant subject ever be broached 
at table. 

To be ever ready and glad to give a place at 
one's board to a friend. 

To be temperate in eating as well as in drink- 
ing. 

For a Christian " to eat to live, not live to 
eat/' 



148 



The Correct Thing 



For a Catholic to serve Friday fare on Friday, 
no matter who is expected to dine. 

To have a crucifix in every bedroom. 

To have Catholic engravings or paintings in 
the parlors as well as in bedrooms. 

For children to love, honor, and obey their 
parents. 

For parents to teach children their prayers 
as soon as they are able to talk. 

To be careful that children never see nor 
hear anything that could tarnish their inno- 
cence in the slightest degree. 

To take care that children are not frightened 
by stories of ghosts and hobgoblins. 

To punish them when they need correction. 

To be kind but firm always with children. 

To watch over their associations. 

To answer their questions accurately. 

To understand their faults as well as their 
perfections. 

To let them dress as children, partake of the 
amusements of children, be obedient as chil- 
dren, think as children, learn as children, be 
innocent as children. 



In the Home Circle, 149 

To remember that a "grown-up child" is a 
disgusting as well as a sorrowful spectacle. 

To understand that precocity is not talent. 

To remember the old maxim about the twig 
and the tree. 

To celebrate both the birthdays and the 
feasts of the patron saints of the several mem- 
bers of the family, as well as all other family 
feasts, since it tends to foster a love of family 
and of home. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To think that only the rich can have happy 
homes. 

To lay aside good manners with one's best 
clothes, to be used only in society. 

For a chivalrous admirer to develop into a 
boorish and indifferent husband. 

For a beautiful, fascinating girl to unmask as 
a commonplace, ugly wife. 

To imagine that little quarrels never develop 
into big ones. 

For a man to dole out his money to his wife 
as if it were war-time rations. 



150 The Correct Thing 

For a man who spends money for cigars, 
wines, expensive luncheons, club-dues, news- 
papers, suppers, and baseball, to find fault if his 
wife indulges in candy, concerts, flowers, maga- 
zines, pretty clothes, and insists on entertaining 
her friends. 

For a woman to plan her housekeeping on a 
scale beyond her income. 

To sacrifice comfort for the sake of keeping 
up appearances. 

For a woman to imagine that her neighbors 
care particularly whether she keeps one servant 
or a dozen. 

To forget that it is an utter impossibility to 
please everybody, and that if one pleases one's 
self and one's household there is a certainty of 
pleasing somebody. 

For a man to imagine that he knows more than 
his wife, simply because he happens to be a man. 

For a woman to neglect her personal appear- 
ance at home, reserving all her taste and trouble 
for society. 

To imagine that children raised in an atmos- 
phere of wrangling, temper, selfishness, and 



In the Home Circle. 151 

coldness are not going to develop traits in 
keeping with their surroundings. 

To be discourteous, overbearing, selfish, blunt, 
and cold in the home circle. 

To think family prayers are obsolete. 

To act as if the day belonged to one^s self 
and need not be sanctified by prayer, and that 
only at night is the assistance of God required. 

To think that grace before meals should only 
be said in convents, and that worldlings, like 
horses, are excused. 

To make the dinner-table the tribunal for 
hearing all the family complaints. 

To consider hospitality among the obsolete 
virtues. 

To be a gourmand at table. 

To act as if one took an especial delight in 
eating. 

To serve meat on Friday at a Catholic table 
(hotels excepted). 

For children to rule their parents and the 
household. 

For children to be able to speak " pieces '* 
before they are able to say their prayers. 



152 The Correct Thing 

To permit a profane word or a doubtful con- 
versation before children. 

To allow children to have the immodest or 
coarse pictures which unfortunately are only too 
plentiful. 

To have vulgar paintings in the parlors. 

To allow nurses to frighten children in their 
charge in any way. 

To forget that many a child has been made 
nervous for life because of early frights. 

To punish a child because one is angry, and 
not because it needs correction. 

To imagine that one's own children for some 
occult reason are created brighter, better, and 
smarter than the children of any one else. 

To think that children who are not taught to 
be truthful, upright, honorable, and courteous 
will grow so naturally. 

To think that children will outgrow their 
faults, and to forget that they may outgrow their 
virtues. 

To be spasmodic and changeable in dealing 
with children. 

To forget that children acquire their earliest 
information through persistent questioning. 



In the Home Circle, 153 

To forget that bad associations corrupt good 
manners. 

To imagine that it is not a very serious thing 
to be responsible for the spiritual as well as the 
temporal welfare of a child. 

To permit children to think more of dress 
than of their games^ to ape the manners of 
young ladies and gentlemen. 

To talk about their engagements, their ad- 
mirers, their conquests ; to permit them to think 
disobedience a small matter ; to have them in- 
terested in subjects which belong to an adult 
period ; to let anything ever come into their 
lives which would tarnish the bloom of childish 
innocence. 

To mistake for '^ smartness " what others may 
call impertinence. 

To forget the old saying, that a mother's 
rarest jewels are her children. 

To neglect to send children to church and 
school as soon as they are able to go. 

To send children to any other than a Catholic 
school. 



154 The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN DEALING 
WITH SERVANTS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that servants are human beings 
with human feelings and human weaknesses. 

To insist that servants should do their work 
thoroughly and punctually. 

To be kind and considerate to them, and to 
teach children to be the same. 

To remember that a word of kindly interest 
in their affairs costs little, and may be productive 
of much benefit. 

To be ever ready to praise where praise is 
deserved. 

To administer reproof and correction, where 
necessary, in private, and in a calm, firm manner. 

To remember that it is lowering to one's dig- 
nity to give way to anger to a servant, no matter 
how much provoked. 

To discharge a servant peremptorily for grave 
impertinence or direct disobedience. 



In Dealing With Servants. 155 

To see that each servant under one's charge 
goes to Mass on Sundays and holy-days, to con- 
fession at regular times, and to encourage them 
to belong to sodalities. 

To know that this is not a mere counsel, but 
a solemn duty, and that a master or mistress 
who neglects it commits sin. 

To encourage them to read good books. 

To see that they have a comfortable room. 

To look after their welfare should they get 
sick in one's service. 

To encourage them to save their wages in- 
stead of spending money foolishly, or making 
uncertain investments. 

To permit them certain times for recreation. 

To know what company they keep. 

To see that they have enough to eat. 

To forbid waste. 

To be patient in training them into one's 
particular ways. 

To remember that a girl coming from a 
peasant's abode in Europe cannot be expected 
to know even the names, to say nothing of the 
use, of certain articles in a refined household. 



156 The Correct Thing 

To remember that it is dishonorable to entice 
a good servant away from an acquaintance by 
the promise of higher wages or easier hours ; 
and that in many instances the neighbor in 
question would mind it less if one walked off 
with a piece of bric-a-brac from her parlor table, 
for money could replace the one, whilst for the 
other there might be plenty of trouble in get- 
ting a substitute. 

To imitate the example of the chatelaines of 
old in their management of servants. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To forget that good servants are not born, 
but are generally made through much patience 
and hard work. 

To allow servants to be lax, tardy, and sloth- 
ful in doing their work. 

To be capricious, whimsical, and tyrannical 
with servants, or to allow children to be so. 

To forget that in this day and time a good 
servant is a treasure, and that an overbearing 
mistress may count on " receiving warning," 



In Dealing With Servants, 157 

To treat servants as if they were mere autom- 
atons to one*s bidding. 

To scold servants before other people. 

To reprove for a trifle when one is vexed, and 
let what is grievous pass unnoticed when one 
is in good humor. 

To forget one's dignity on any occasion with 
servants. 

To be totally oblivious of their aches and 
pains and troubles. 

To accept exemplary service as one's due 
without a word of kindly appreciation, even if 
one does pay for the service. 

To forget that many pay good wages and but 
few get good service. 

To forget that impertinence unpunished de- 
moralizes one's authority. 

To be careless and neglectful about seeing to 
the religious duties of one's servants. 

To arrange one's household and meal-hours 
on Sunday so as to make it extremely difficult, 
if not impossible, for servants to get to Mass. 

To forget that a servant who is not faithful 



158 The Correct Thing 

to God is not going to be faithful to an em- 
ployer. 

To permit them to have, or to read immoral 
and worthless books and papers in one's house. 

To allow them to remain out late at night. 

To put servants in damp, dark, illy-ventilated, 
cold rooms. 

To turn a servant out on the world who gets 
sick in one's service. 

To allow them to keep questionable company 
whilst in one's service. 

To imagine that servants who work hard and 
have tolerably healthy constitutions can live on 
air and a few leavings from the household table. 

To think that it is not a mild sort of stealing 
to entice a good servant away from some one 
else. 



In Education. 159 



THE CORRECT THING IN EDUCATION. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that a true education must be 
physical, mental, and spiritual. 

For parents to educate their children. 

To know that mere instruction may lack a 
great deal of being education. 

To know that animals can be instructed, but 
that only human beings can be educated. 

To know that if a child cannot learn mathe- 
matics by intuition, it cannot learn religion in 
that way either. 

To know that education is the training, de- 
veloping, and perfecting of one's powers. 

To remember that a little learning is a dan- 
gerous thing. 

To favor that system of education which 
makes good Christians, good citizens, and good 
members of a family. 

For the State to compel parents to give their 
children an education which will train them to 



i6o The Correct Thing 

be competent voters, loyal citizens, and useful 
members of a community. 

To know that children belong to their parents 
and not to the State. 

For parents to know that they are bound in 
conscience to give their children an education 
suitable to their station in life. 

To know that an education which ignores the 
soul is defective and un-Christian. 

To know that a large per centage of the 
criminals in the United States were trained in 
non-religious schools. 

For every child of Christian parents to be 
given a Christian education as its right. 

To know that a whole community cannot 
justly be made to pay for that which only a part 
can in conscience use. 

For the State to assume the duties of educator 
only where the parents or guardians fail to do 
their duty. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To educate a child as if its existence were 
to end with the grave. 



In Education, i6i 

For parents to shirk their responsibilities 
towards their children on the public. 

To imagine that a child which has been in- 
structed in certain arts and sciences and sent to 
a gymnasium is educated. 

To expect a descendant of Adam to be good, 
and loyal, and conscientious, and firm in the 
hour of trial, and strict in the performance of 
every duty simply because it is natural to be so. 
Too confiding victims may learn better by sad 
experience. 

For the average college graduate to think 
that there is nothing more for him to learn. 

To forget that the usual way of judging a tree 
is by its fruits. 

For the extremely fallible men who compose 
the State to interfere in the education of chil- 
dren whose parents or guardians are doing all 
that is necessary in that regard. 

To forget that people must exist before the 
State is possible, and that it is therefore reason- 
able to suppose that the State must have been 
instituted for the good of the people, and not the 
people for the benefit of the State. 



1 62 The Correct Thing 

For Jones to think that Smith ought to pay 
taxes to educate his (Jones') children, and yet 
be indignant if some one suggests that on the 
same principle Brown ought to be made to pay 
for their shoes and hats. 

For consistent Christians to uphold a system 
of education which takes no account of God 
and the spiritual part of the child's nature. 

To ignore the fact that the great mass of the 
American people are Christians, and that Chris- 
tian sentiments underlie their government, and 
keep in restraint the passions of the un-Chris- 
tian mob. 

To forget that the cause of this state of affairs 
is the Christian education which the founders 
of the country received. 



In Reading, 163 



THE CORRECT THING IN READING. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that there are books and books 
and books. 

Good books, bad books, instructive books, 
false books, frivolous books, corrupting books, 
senseless books, amusing books, edifying books, 
learned books, shallow books, coarse books, 
insidious books, sensational books, prosaic 
books, immoral books, spiritual books ; books 
devoted to every ology, science, art, fad, or foi- 
ble under the sun. 

That people read for pleasure, profit, or relax- 
ation. 

That as no one can read all the good books, 
even if life were a dozen times longer than it 
usually is, it would seem that sensible people 
would never be found not " passing the time," 
but wasting the time over books that are worth- 
less or distinctly bad, 



164 The Correct Thing 

To have some system about one's reading if 
one would derive lasting profit from the books 
read. 

To consider money spent for good books as 
money well invested. 

For the average woman to examine her con- 
science well in regard to what she has read dur- 
ing her past life and to make a firm purpose of 
amendment. 

To remember that a mind which is fed on 
newspapers, fashion magazines, sensational and 
trashy novels, to the exclusion of everything 
else, soon gets incapacitated for heavier and more 
wholesome food. 

For a woman to make an inviolable rule never 
to read anything which she would be ashamed 
to acknowledge having read to the man whose 
good opinion she values most highly. 

To lend a bad book, no matter how corrupted 
already the taste of the person soliciting it. 

To burn any corrupting book which may hap- 
pen to come into one's possession, either through 
ignorance of its nature when purchasing it, or 
in any other way. 



In Reading, 165 

To remember that one's library is an index to 
one's character. 

To know that a taste for good reading can 
be cultivated. 

To know that good novels may be both inter- 
esting and instructive. 

That the great Cardinal Newman himself did 
not disdain a good novel. 

To remember that novels are like mushrooms: 
they should be partaken of sparingly and great 
care used in their selection. 

For each mind to select the food best suited 
to it, provided always that it is the best of its 
kind. 

To remember that a few books well studied 
are more beneficial than a great many cursorily 
read. 

To keep a note-book in which is entered 
every book and important article read during 
the year, with a short summary of their contents. 

To know that Cardinal Newman, Gladstone, 
and many other great scholars practise this 
rule. 

For cultivated Catholics to know the Catho- 



1 66 The Correct TJwig 

lie position in all the agitating questions of the 
day. 

For parents to permit no books in their house 
which might have a demoralizing effect on their 
children. 

To be as incensed at a person who recom- 
mends a bad book as at one who would mislead 
you into a mudhole. 

To remember that as mud cannot fall on a 
white gown without leaving a stain, so neither 
can the mud of bad books fall on the soul with- 
out leaving a mark. 

For American girls of a certain kind to re- 
member that some of the noted French novelists 
whose works they so eagerly devour would no 
more permit their own daughters to read one of 
their books than they would allow them to en- 
ter a plague-stricken hospital. 

To remember that there is a good deal of a 
fallacy in the much-quoted saying that *^ To the 
pure all things are pure," for practical demon- 
stration has proven that mud is mud, disease is 
disease, no matter what angelic purity may char- 
acterize their victims. Of course some natures 



In Reading. 167 

have an abnormal capacity for getting soiled, 
just as some have constitutions for getting ill; 
but that fact does not lessen the muddiness of 
the mud, nor its tendency to leave a spot on 
whatever it touches. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To read any and every thing that may happen 
to fall in one's way. 

To forget that to people of sense and intellec- 
tual resources the time generally passes all too 
quickly without any assistance in its flight from 
lurid or trashy books. 

For girls to spend money for candy and toi- 
let accessories and nothing for entertaining and 
instructive reading-matter. 

For young men to indulge in every luxury 
excepting a library. 

To forget that the frivolous girl is /^^^/ now 
and that the cultivated one is to the front. 

To imagine that age and ugliness are neces- 
sary adjuncts to learning. 

To read anything which one would blush to 
be discovered in the act of reading. 



1 68 The Correct Thing 

To forget that those who lend or recommend 
bad books are accessory to another person's sin. 

To believe that a body fed on adulterated 
food will become ill, but that a mind can be 
gorged on all sorts of trash and yet escape intel- 
lectual dyspepsia. 

To forget that one is judged by the company 
one keeps, and that books are one's most con- 
stant companions. 

To forget that the poison in some books is 
insidious and not easily discoverable to the 
novice. 

To consult milliners and modistes about one's 
attire, and yet consider it not worth one's while 
to consult anybody about the books to read — 
the attire furnished for the mind. 

For Catholics to be ignorant of the great 
books written by representative Catholics. 

To imagine that Catholic periodicals can take 
a high rank without support. 

To consider it no lack of cultivation to be 
ignorant of what Catholics have written and 
said about the great questions which agitate the 
intellectual world. 



In Reading. 169 

To expect the savant and the sage, the scien- 
tist and the writer, the tired matron and the friv- 
olous girl, the mechanic and the clerk — all to be 
interested in the same class of books. 

To imagine that one who reads everything 
that comes out is very brilliant or deeply 
learned. 

To read a book only because it happens to be 
the fashion to do so. 

To read without any system. 

To keep no account of the books read. 

To imagine that a person who extends the cir- 
culation of a bad book is not to blame for the 
damage done. 

To allow questionable books in one's home. 

To flatter one's self that one can read with 
impunity all sorts of books without experiencing 
any evil eftects from the indulgence. 

To forget that a mind can be kept healthy 
easier than it can be restored to health after 
once diseased. 

To forget that a mind not already inclined to 
evil would take no pleasure in suggestive books, 
but would, on the contray, be disgusted. 



lyo 



The Correct Thing 



To ignore the advice and guidance of older, 
wiser, and more experienced persons in the seri- 
ous matter of choosing proper books. 

To neglect to subscribe for a Catholic news- 
paper or magazine. 

To neglect to pay the subscription when due. 



In Associating with Non-Catholics. 171 



THE CORRECT THING IN ASSOCIATING 
WITH NON-CATHOLICS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To be willing and ready at all times and 
under all circumstances to give the reason for 
one's religious beliefs when asked to do so by 
a sincere seeker after truth. 

To avoid argument merely for the sake of 
argument. 

To say nothing needlessly to wound the feel- 
ings and religious opinions of those out of the 
Church. 

To refute calumnies against the Church when 
they come under one's notice. 

To remember that all minds cannot see alike ; 
that certain minds unillumined by the grace of 
God are utterly unable to grasp religious truths 
which are perfectly clear to even a little child 
who has studied its Catechism faithfully. 



172 The Correct Thing 

To be firm always in one's adherence to the 
teachings of the Church, even at the risk of 
giving offence to others outside her pale. 

To remember that " a liberal Catholic,'* in the 
sense in which the term is usually understood, 
is often no Catholic at all. 

To know that right and wrong is a matter 
of conscience, even where one has a false con- 
science. 

To know that a Catholic has no excuse for 
having a false conscience. 

To know that ignorance is hardly an excuse 
for a Catholic, for there is every chance afforded 
for knowing the truth. 

To know that it is forbidden for a Catholic 
to take part in any Protestant service under 
any circumstance. 

To know that it is forbidden, not because 
there is any fear on the part of the Church that 
a well-instructed Catholic would be lead away 
from her fold, but because it is offering a gra- 
tuitous insult to God for a consistent Catholic 
to take part in a form of worship believed to be 
heretical, and another insult to the religious 



In Associating with Non-Catholics, 173 

feelings of sincere members of the Church in 
question by reducing a religious service, very 
dear and sacred to them, to the level of a mere 
spectacle. 

To remember that curiosity is not the proper 
motive in seeking the house of God. 

To understand that whilst it would be wrong 
for a Catholic to go to a Protestant church, it 
is not wrong for a Protestant to go to a Catholic 
church, simply because it is one of the funda- 
mental doctrines of all Protestant denomina- 
tions that religion and religious opinions are 
very much a matter of private interpretation of 
the Bible ; that two persons may belong to one 
church and yet not both believe exactly the 
same thing, and that all churches are alike 
pleasing to God in proportion to the sincerity 
of their members. 

In brief, that the Catholic Church forbids 
her children to participate in religious services 
outside of her pale, and the Protestant churches 
leave their members to do as they please in the 
matter. 

To know that Catholics visiting in non- 



174 The Correct Thing 

Catholic families should be excused from taking 
part in the family prayers. 

To participate in the grace said at table, if 
nothing is said contrary to the teaching of the 
Church in the form used. 

To know that Catholics are excommunicated 
who marry before a Protestant minister. 

To know that Catholics cannot officiate as 
bridesmaids or groomsmen at weddings solem- 
nized in Protestant churches. 

To know that it is not forbidden for Catho- 
lics to be present as spectators merely, and 
as invited guests. 

To know that Catholics cannot act as pall- 
bearers at a funeral conducted by masonic 
lodges. 

To remember that example is more powerful 
than precept. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To be unable to give a lucid explanation of 
one's belief. 

To be fond of arguments and religious dis- 
cussions. 



In Associating with Non-Catholics, 175 

To be careless about what one says, and the 
use of expressions calculated to give offence. 

To weakly agree to slanders on the reputation 
and integrity of the Church or her ministers. 

To manifest surprise and impatience at the 
failure of any one to grasp a truth that seems 
so plain to one's self. 

To forget that whilst truth remains ever the 
same, the lamp of Faith, which is God's grace 
in the soul, may burn differently at different 
times and may even for some reason be with- 
drawn altogether ; and that as a blind person 
cannot perceive the objects in the room, although 
the objects be there, so a soul left in darkness 
cannot perceive truth, although truth exists as 
plain as ever. 

To imagine that because one cannot see a 
truth it is therefore not so. 

For a Catholic to say that one Church is as 
good as another ; for every intelligent Protestant 
knows that a consistent Catholic cannot think 
so, and that a Catholic who says he does is tell- 
ing a deliberate falsehood. 



176 The Correct Thi7ig 

To try to find excuses for doctrines which 
the Church never taught. 

To go to a Protestant church and then neg- 
lect to mention the fact in confession, on the 
plea that one only went " to look on/' " to pass 
away the time," to "listen to the music," " to see 
what it was all like," " because a friend desired 
it," etc., and not to take part in the service. 

For Catholics to sing in Protestant churches. 

To act in any way that would bring reproach 
on the Church or give scandal to those either 
in or out of the fold. 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands. 177 



THE CORRECT THING WHEN TRAVEL- 
LING IN FOREIGN COUNTRIES. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that no duty and no passports 
are required for good manners, and that it would 
therefore be advisable to take them along with 
one. 

To put one's conscience and one's worldly af- 
fairs in perfect order before sailing for foreign 
shores; for whilst travel has been rendered com- 
paratively safe, accidents will happen on the 
best of regulated lines. 

To remember that a severe case of seasick- 
ness brings out the ugly traits in one's character 
as effectively as hot tea brings out the measles. 

To take for granted that the captain and offi- 
cers of the ship know their duty, and that un- 
solicited advice will not be appreciated. 

To remember that the caprices of the ocean 
and other causes give ample scope for the prac- 



178 The Correct Thing 

tice of resignation, patience, self-sacrifice, and 
other heroic virtues. 

To be pleasant and genial with those one 
meets on shipboard, unless some notorious or 
particularly offensive person deserves to be con- 
sidered the exception to the rule. 

To be chary of forming friendships with 
chance travelling companions. 

To remember that monopolists have no place 
on board a ship, and that the most comfortable 
places cannot be held exclusively by any one 
person. 

To remember that Catholics have no more 
privilege to take part in Protestant worship on 
shipboard than they had on land. 

. To be willing and obliging in regard to tak- 
ing part in theatricals and concerts gotten up on 
the ship for charity or merely for amusement. 

To remember that even cultivated Americans 
can learn much by observation in Europe. 

To be prepared to meet boors and miscellan- 
eous cranks as well as agreeable and cultivated 
people. 

To know all about the Inquisition, St. Bar- 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands, 179 

tholomew's-day, Indulgences, and the other per- 
ennial springs of non-Catholic satisfaction, for 
the average tourist is required to take copious 
draughts at the table d'hote, in the hotel draw- 
ing-rooms, and other places where travellers are 
thrown in contact with other travellers. 

To understand that the deeds and misdeeds, 
the licentiousness and want of ability which 
characterized some of the Catholic kings were 
the results of human frailty and not of their re- 
ligion. 

To be able to explain intelligently that the 
Church does not claim either infallibility or im- 
peccability for her children, and that she is not 
and should not in any justice be held responsible 
for the sins of individual members. 

To understand that one can be patriotic and 
appreciative of one's own country without be- 
ing offensive and abusive in regard to the coun- 
tries of other people. 

To remember that Europe and Europeans 
managed to exist fairly well for over a thousand 
years before America was even thought of. 

To note the effects on the continent of the cru- 



i8o The Correct Thing 

sades of religious enlightenment which, accord- 
ing to Ruskin, every Briton who crosses the chan- 
nel should help along. 

To study the methods of the average An- 
glican crusader of a certain class, — the Briton 
who acts as an animated guide-book in matters 
of history to his chance travelling companions; 
who is fond of drawing parallels between Eng- 
land and other countries, always to the utter ex- 
tinction of the other countries ; who can demon- 
strate the problem to his own and the satisfaction 
of every true Briton, that Catholicity and crime 
are interchangeable terms, and that the " poverty 
and illiteracy " of continental countries are direct- 
ly traceable to their religion, and that the natural 
resources of the country, the vast numbers of 
the inhabitants to be provided for, have nothing 
to do with the matter ; the Briton who " pockets 
the candle because it was charged in the bill,'* 
appropriates the whole of a fowl in order to pre- 
vent the dulling of the cutlery in the act of carv- 
ing it; who insists that the entire planetary sys- 
tem be stopped if the doing so would facilitate 
a journey for which he has paid ; who calmly 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands, i8i 

extinguishes the guide in his efforts to discharge 
his duties; discovers that the average Frenchman 
speaks barbarous French and not at all in ac- 
cordance to rule ; finds Vesuvius a rascally 
swindle, the Geneva Lakes a much vaunted 
humbug for the gratification of conscience- 
less hotel-keepers ; gondolas in Venice beastly 
uncomfortable ; the Alps decidedly below par 
of what mountains should be that set them- 
selves up as objects of interest ; the wayside 
statues an insult to enlightened English Chris- 
tianity ; the contentment of the continental 
peasantry the most incontrovertible proof of 
their benighted condition ; who rails at the want 
of liberty in Catholic countries, and nearly goes 
into apoplexy in places where Catholics are al- 
lowed the liberty to serve God according to 
their own ideas ; who considers the fleas in 
Rome a providential visitation on the papal re- 
gime ; the Briton who is so overcome with 
sympathy for the sufferings on the continent 
that he quite forgets all about the suffering 
right across St. George's Channel. 

These and similar peculiarities the thoughtful 



1 82 The Correct Thing 

tourist should note, not for imitation but for 
avoidance. 

Since it is " meet and proper," and " quite 
the correct thing" to seek information when 
abroad, to find out from the Briton, who knows 
everything, why the notorious crimes and de- 
baucheries of Henry VIII. and his bar-sinister 
daughter Elizabeth, who w^ere the recognized and 
legal heads and founders of the English Church, 
did not affect the purity and integrity of the 
doctrines of the Church — and why, on the other 
hand, the crimes real and alleged of some of the 
popes are proof positive of the corruption of the 
doctrines of the Catholic Church ? 

Why were the grand old churches in Eng- 
land, built by Catholics and owned by Catho- 
lics, seized and appropriated for use by the 
representatives of the English Church ? 

Why is it right to steal a church and not 
right to steal anything else ? 

Why do English historians have so much to 
say about the persecutions of ^^ Bloody Mary" 
and so little about the massacres of ** Virgin 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands. 183 

Elizabeth,'* who calmly appropriated another 
woman's husband ? 

What was the exact number of the priests who 
were hanged, drawn, and quartered at Tyburn, 
and the Catholic lay people who were treated 
in the same way ? 

Why is it " meet, right, and most commend- 
able " in England for the younger sons of ^^ gen- 
tlemen" to enter orders and be presented in 
due time with the family living, regardless as to 
whether there is any aptitude or not for the 
ecclesiastical lot, and yet it be so dreadful a 
crime for parents on the continent to urge the 
ecclesiastical state on their children ? 

Why is the Catholic Church held to teach 
that licentiousness, theft, and oppression are 
right because Catholic kings sometimes practised 
those vices, and the English Church not held 
as teaching the same thing, when not only Prot- 
estant kings, but English kings, the very heads 
of the Church itself, were guilty of the same 
crimes and worse ? 

Does crossing the channel make fish for 
Protestants become fowl for Catholics ? 



184 The Correct Thing 

Why is the code of morality so much lower 
in Protestant Scotland than it is in Catholic 
Spain ? 

Why is poverty in Italy considered the direct 
results of the papal government having been so 
long in power, and the poverty and almost in- 
describable suffering in Ireland considered as a 
thing quite apart from the Hanoverian dynasty ? 

Why are Protestants so anxious to force their 
religion upon people who do not want it, and 
so indifferent to the wants of the thousands of 
people right in London, the " centre of the civil- 
ized world," who have no religion at all ? 

Why has London, in proportion to size, more 
crime than any other city in Europe ? 

Why is the brutal degradation which statisti- 
cians have found in some of the mining districts 
of England viewed as among the unavoidable 
things, and yet the mere lack of the ability to 
read and write considered as the direct result 
of bad Catholic governments on the continent ? 

To find out for the benefit of future his- 
torians where the documents can be obtained 
which prove that the popes made a traffic of 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands, 185 

indulgences, used the papal power to oppress 
the weak, and authorized the dark crimes which 
are imputed to them. 

To find out why the Church preserved the 
Sacred Scriptures for nearly two thousand years, 
if she is afraid of their influence on her chil- 
dren. 

Why Catholics founded the Universities of 
Oxford, Heidelberg, Padua, Douai, Salamanca, 
and scores of others, if the Church be the foe 
to education ? 

In return for so much information, to be will- 
ing to give one's informant any little knowledge 
which may happen to lie in one's power. 

To be well versed in history, both sacred and 
profane, before going abroad. 

To remember that guide-books often err. 

To remember that the churches and galleries 
and palaces of Europe were not built exactly 
and solely for the pleasure and benefit of 
tourists. 

To be reasonable, if one can afford it, in the 
matter of fees. 

To remember that pious legends are not matters 



1 86 The Correct Thing 

of faith, although a great many of them are au- 
thenticated and worthy of belief. 

To remember that it is only the courteous 
thing to leave pecuniary mementoes in the 
churches and convents, the visiting of which 
afforded one pleasure and profit. 

To remember that thanks and apologies cost 
nothing, and are among the outward signs which 
indicate good breeding. 

To remember that it is not always necessary 
to express one's opinion about a thing which is 
not altogether pleasing to one's fancy. 

To remember that tourists are not sent abroad 
to instruct foreigners as to their own ignorance 
or the shortcomings of their country. 

To insist that those in one's party show 
proper reverence in the churches visited. 

To remember that a falsehood elsewhere does 
not become mere prevarication in the custom- 
house. 

To remember when with supercilious foreign- 
ers that if America has no great pictures, she at 
least holds the patent on the most perfect plough 
in the world. 



When Travelling In Foreig7i Lands, 187 

To desist, for the sake of a long-suffering 
public, from writing a book of " European Im- 
pressions " on one's return. 

It is Not Correct Thing 

To imagine that a woman will be mistaken 
for a lady if she does not act as one. 

To think that the practice of the Christian 
virtues should be suspended on sea. 

To forget that patient endurance and a lemon 
are the best antidotes for seasickness. 

To imagine that chance auditors are vitally 
interested in one's physical condition, and to 
therefore inflict a minute account of all the 
stages of mal de mer on them. 

To forget to say one's night and morning 
prayers. 

For a gentleman (?) to imagine that profanity 
on shipboard is a gentlemanly accomplishment. 

To join in any religious services held by a 
Protestant minister on shipboard. 

To be ignorant as to whether the charges 
made against the Church are true or false. 



1 88 The Correct Thing 

To try to explain to tourists what one does 
not understand one's self. 

To eat meat on Friday when travelling, if one 
is not ill and there is no necessity for so doing. 

To judge cultivated and enlightened Protes- 
tants by the blustering Briton one meets every- 
where on the continent of Europe. 

To seek religious discussions when travelling. 

To inflict one's society on those who evidently 
do not appreciate it. 

To imagine that there is nothing ill-bred in 
visiting foreign convents and then ridiculing 
their inmates. 

To compare the monk who kindly acts as one's 
guide to a cow, as did a certain strong-minded 
and distinguished lady from Massachusetts. 

To forget the customary fees to guides, ver- 
gers, etc. 

For Catholic girls to imitate Miss Daisy Miller. 

After one's return to make use of the phrase 
" when I was in Europe" more than ten times a 
day. 

To ape foreign manners and thus become 
ridiculous. 



When Travelling in Foreign Lands. 189 

To imagine that one is to be pitied who has 
not been '' abroad." 

To forget that, after all, " there is no place 
like home." 



igo The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING FOR SPECIAL 
DEVOTIONS. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To remember that for each day of the week 
there is a special devotion. 

Sunday, the Holy Trinity. 

Monday, the Souls in Purgatory. 

Tuesday, the Guardian Angels. 

Wednesday, St. Joseph. 

Thursday, the Blessed Sacrament. 

Friday, the Sacred Heart and the Passion. 

Saturday, the Blessed Virgin. 

That the months are also consecrated to 
particular devotions, the most generally ob- 
served being : 

March, St. Joseph. 

May, the Blessed Virgin. 

June, the Sacred Heart. 

July, the Precious Blood. 

October, the Guardian Angels and the Rosary. 

November, the Souls in Purgatory. 



For Special Devotions, 191 

To hear Mass, or perform some work of de- 
votion, on the feastday of one's patron saint. 

To congratulate clergymen and members of 
religious communities on their namesdays ; that 
is, the feastdays of their patron saints. 

To know that in Catholic countries the 
namesdays are celebrated as well as the birth- 
days. 

To know that the patronal feast of a country 
is always a day of obligation : as the feast of 
the Immaculate Conception in the United 
States, St. Patrick in Ireland, St. Boniface in 
Germany, St. James in Spain, St. George in 
England, etc. 

To pray to St. Joseph for money. 

To St. Anthony for things that are lost or 
misplaced. 

To St. Aloysius, the patron of youth, for as- 
sistance in studies and the virtue of purity. 

To St. Cecilia, the patroness of musicians, for 
success in musical studies. 

To St. Thomas Aquinas, patron of philos- 
ophers, for a clear understanding of philosophical 
and theological questions. 



192 The Correct Thing 

To St. Roche for the restoration of health, 
and when a plague is threatened. 

To St. Blase for a cure of all diseases of the 
throat. 

To St. Anne, mother of the Blessed Virgin 
and patroness of married women, for all the 
graces and assistance necessary in the matri- 
monial state. 

To St. Catherine for a husband. 

To St. Patrick, the great apostle of Ireland, 
for conversions. 

For those who desire the protection and as- 
sistance of St. Aloysius, to " make the Aloysius 
Sundays ; " that is, to approach Holy Commu- 
nion on the six Sundays preceding his Feast — 
the 2ist of June. 

To know that by approaching Holy Com- 
munion on the five Sundays preceding the feast 
of St. Francis of Assisi, — October 4th, — a plen- 
ary indulgence may be gained on each Sunday. 

To know that in all churches belonging to 
the Franciscans, as well as in all churches and 
chapels in which the Third Order of St. Francis 



JFor special Devotions, 193 

is canonically established, the same indulgences 
can be gained as are attached to the Church of 
the Portiuncula in Rome, by following the same 
conditions : namely, confession and Holy Com- 
munion and six visits to the Church, praying 
for the intention of the Holy Father and the 
welfare of the Church, on the Feast of the Por- 
tiuncula, the 2d of August, between the hours 
of sunrise and sunset. (Plenary indulgence 
applicable to the souls in purgatory.) 

To make a novena, that is, the nine days' 
prayer, by way of preparation for the great 
feastdays in the year. 

If this novena is public in the church, to 
be punctual in attendance, and to arrive in time. 

If absolutely impossible to make the novena 
in the church, to do so at home, having a stated 
hour each day for saying the prayers. 

For persons in the world who desire to lead 
a more perfect life than they have hitherto done 
to join the Third Order of St. Francis. [This 
order was founded by St. Francis at the earnest 
solicitation of some pious people who wished 



194 The Correct Thing 

to lead a more perfect Christian life without 
abandoning any of their ordinary avocations in 
the world. Application for membership may be 
made to any Franciscan priest, or to others to 
whom they have delegated authority. The 
habit consists only of the scapular and cord 
worn under the ordinary apparel ; the obliga- 
tions are to perform certain works of devotion, 
none of them incompatible with worldly duties ; 
the rewards are a great many indulgences and 
spiritual favors.] 

For all Catholics worthy of the name to join 
the League of the Sacred Heart. 

To know that this is a society which owes its 
origin to the Blessed Margaret Mary, a Visita- 
tion nun in France. That it is divided into 
three degrees : The first degree comprises all 
the associates who pledge themselves simply to 
make an offering at their morning prayers of all 
their works, prayers, and sufferings of the day, 
for the honor of the Sacred Heart. The second 
degree is composed of those who unite to say 
one decade of the rosary daily for the inten- 
tions of the League. The third degree com- 



For special Devotions. 195 

prises those who undertake to make a monthly 
or weekly reparation to the Sacred Heart. 

To know that the first Friday of the month 
is consecrated especially to the Sacred Heart, 
and that all members of the League should 
make their Communion of Reparation on that 
day. 

To know that a plenary indulgence may be 
gained on that day on the usual conditions. 

To wear a scapular of the Sacred Heart and 
also to have a picture of the Sacred Heart in 
one's room. 

To subscribe for the " Messenger of the Sacred 
Heart," if one desires to be informed of the work 
the League is doing, and to keep alive the spirit 
of piety. 

To know that in nearly all parishes a League 
or Confraternity of the Sacred Heart exists, 
and that there is no expense and no ceremony 
required for admission. 

For those piously inclined to act as pro- 
moters. 

For those who can possibly do so, to " make 
the nine Fridays ;" that is, approach Holy Com- 



196 The Correct Thing 

munion on the first Friday of every month for 
nine consecutive months. 

To know that if one misses a Friday, no 
matter for what reason, the nine must be begun 
again. 

To join the Guard of Honor. [That is, a 
band who pledge themselves to spend one hour 
each day in spiritual union with the Sacred 
Heart. It includes no duty excepting to make 
the intention at the beginning of the hour to 
honor the Sacred Heart in whatever one may 
be doing at the time, whether studying, work- 
ing, or even walking. In convents, and by 
some pious people in the world, the Hour of 
Guard is passed before the Blessed Sacrament. 
Even people who are not very pious manage 
sometimes to spend a part of their hour in the 
church.] 

For all men who feel any compassion for the 
poor to join the St. Vincent de Paul Society. 

For young ladies to become ^* Daughters of 
the Queen." 

For young ladies to belong to a Sodality of 
the Blessed Virgin, either at their parish church 



For Special Devotions* 197 

or in connection with one of the convents, many 
of which have sodalities for the benefit of their 
old pupils and others. 

For young men to remember that sodalities 
exist for them quite as well as for their sisters. 

For married ladies to belong to the Sodality 
of St. Anne. 

For all those who honor the name of Our 
Lord to join the Holy Name Society. 

For men and boys addicted to the horrible 
vice of swearing to be punctilious in their at- 
tendance at the meetings of this society. 

For all persons, whether members of the 
society or not, to make an act of reparation in 
their hearts when they hear the Sacred Name 
taken in vain. 

For pious Catholics of both sexes, and all 
ages and conditions, to join the Confraternity 
of the Holy Face. 

To know that the object of this society is to 
honor the suffering Face of Our Redeemer, im- 
printed on the veil of Veronica, and to repair 
by acts of devotion and penance the outrages 



198 The Correct Thing 

offered in these days of impiety to the majesty 
of God. 

For the members to recite daily one Pater, 
Ave, and Gloria, and the invocation, ^^ Lord, 
show us Thy Face and we shall be saved." 

To wear an image of the Holy Face either on 
a medal, cross, or scapular. 

If convenient, to attend the monthly meetings. 

To extend the devotion as far as lies in one's 
powder. 

To have one's name inscribed on the register 
of the association. 

For Catholics who ever expect to go to Purga- 
tory, or who have any relatives and friends 
there, or who feel any compassion for the suf- 
ferings of others, to join the Purgatorian Society. 

For Catholics who desire to see the altar of 
God adorned and taken care of, to join the 
Altar Society. 

To pay one's dues after joining. 

To remember that the greatest women, royalty 
itself, have always been proud to work for the 
altar. The daughter of an emperor, Isabella 
of Brazil, scrubbed the church more than once 



For Special Devotions, 199 

and was always an active member of the Altar 
Society. 

For every Catholic, from the time he reaches 
the age of reason — usually at seven years — until 
the hour of his death, to wear the scapular. 

To know that the brown scapular, or little 
habit of the Blessed Virgin, is composed of two 
square pieces of brown woollen cloth, connected 
by two cords and designed to be worn over 
the shoulders, hence the name scapular, from 
scapulcE^ shoulders. According to tradition, it 
was given to St. Simon Stock, General of the 
Carmelite Order, on the i6th of July, 1251, by 
the Blessed Virgin herself. 

To know that one must be invested in the 
scapular by a priest having the authority to do 
so. 

To know that when one's scapulars wear out 
one need not be enrolled again : simply procure 
a pair of new ones and put them on, and then 
burn the old ones. Anything that has been 
blessed should always be burned, never thrown 
away. 



200 The Correct Thing 

To know that a person may be enrolled with 
the scapulars of another person. 

To know that the picture or embroidery, whilst 
conducing to devotion, is not necessary to the 
integrity of the scapulars. 

If one desires to do so, to cover scapulars 
with linen cases, in which may also be worn 
medals, an Agnus Dei, and other pious objects. 

To know that one who wears the brown scap- 
ular becomes a sharer in the prayers and good 
works of the Carmelite Order, but that if it is 
desired to gain all the numerous indulgences 
seven Our Fathers and seven Hail Marys must 
be recited daily, and, some writers say, abstain 
from meat on Wednesdays and Saturdays. 

For those who wear the scapular to approach 
Holy Communion on the Feast of Mount Car- 
mel — July i6th. 

To be enrolled in the Five Scapulars if the 
opportunity offers. 

The four others, beside the Scapular of Mount 
Carmel, are the Scapular of the Holy Trinity, 
w^hite linen with a red cross ; seven dolors, black 
woolen stuff; Immaculate Conception, light blue 



For Special Devotions. 201 

woolen; scapular of the Passion, red woolen. 
Only priests having special faculties can enroll 
in the Five Scapulars, generally given to the Reg- 
ular Clergy. 

To know that there are many indulgences at- 
tached to the wearing of the Five Scapulars. 

To recite the Angelus morning, noon, and 
night. 

The angel of the Lord declared unto Mary; 

R. And she conceived by the Holy Ghost. 
Hail Mary, etc. 

Behold the handmaid of the Lord ; 

R. Be it done unto me according to thy 
word. Hail Mary, etc. 

The Word was made Flesh, 

R. And dwelt amongst us. Hail Mary, etc. 

Prayer. — Pour forth, we beseech Thee, O 
Lord, Thy grace into our hearts, that we to 
whom the Incarnation of Christ Thy Son was 
made known by the message of an angel may, by 
His passion and cross, be brought to the glory 
of His Resurrection; through the same Christ 
Our Lord. Amen. 

To kneel at the Angelus excepting on Sunday. 



202 The Correct Thing 

On Sunday to stand, bending the knee only at 
the last part to adore the Incarnation. 

To recite the Regina Cceli instead of the An- 
gelus during Easter-tide ; that is, from Holy 
Saturday until Trinity Sunday. 

For those who wish to do so to use the 
rhythmical form of the Regina Coeli. 

Rejoice, O Queen of Heaven, to see. Alleluia! 

The sacred Infant born of thee. Alleluia ! 

Spring up in glory from the tomb. Alleluia ! 

Oh, by thy prayers prevent our doom. Alle- 
luia ! 

Rejoice and be glad, O Virgin Mary. Alle- 
luia ! 

Because Our Lord is truly risen. Alleluia! 

Prayer, — O God, Who through the resurrection 
of Thy Son Our Lord Jesus Christ hast vouch- 
safed to fill the world with joy, grant, we be- 
seech Thee, that by the intercession of the Vir- 
gin Mary, His Mother, we may receive the joys 
of eternal life. Through the same Christ Our 
Lord. Amen. 

In passing a church, for men to lift their hats 
and for women to make the sign of the cross. 



For Special Devotions. 203 

To make a practice of reading some religious 
book every day for a few minutes at least. 
There are a number of excellent little books for 
the beginners in spiritual perfection, divided into 
short paragraphs containing counsels, exhorta- 
tions, or lives of the saints. 

To subscribe for a good Catholic paper, and 
to read it when it comes every week. Religious 
reading is homoeopathic in its effects — a little 
constantly repeated will make an impression 
after a time on the most careless of hearts. 

To remember that one may belong to a great 
many societies and fulfil all the requirements 
laid down for ordinary Christians in a very small 
portion of time — scarcely as much as is devoted 
to the morning paper. To make a cursory esti- 
mate : Sodality, half an hour twice a month ; 
decade of the rosary, five minutes ; morning 
offering to the Sacred Heart, one minute ; spir- 
itual reading, five minutes; ejaculations, about 
thirty seconds each ; Communion on the first 
Friday, one hour a month ; confession and 
preparation for Communion, one hour per 
month ; Angelus, two minutes each time — six 



2Q4 The Correct Thing 

minutes per day ; morning and evening prayers, 
more or less lengthy (more or less brief might 
be more correct), according to one's piety; an 
occasional visit to the Blessed Sacrament ; and 
adding all the time spent in acts of devotion, the 
amount remains surprisingly small, especially 
when compared with the amount wasted in 
gossip or ways that are worse. 

To know that this estimate is intended for the 
primary grades in Christian perfection. 

To remember that one of the most meritori- 
ous acts a person can perform, an act in the 
power of everybody or nearly everybody, is to 
daily assist at the Holy Sacrifice of Mass. 
People who have any claims to piety hear Mass 
as often as they possibly can. 

To remember that it is better to say a few 
prayers well than a great many carelessly. 

To know that the priests of a parish are 
always willing to give all necessary information 
about the devotional societies which one may 
wish to join. 



In Regard to the Rosary, 205 



THE COREECT THING IN REGARD TO 
THE ROSARY. 

It is the Correct Thing 

To have a rosary blessed before using. 

To have the intention when saying it to gain 
the indulgences applied to the blessed rosary. 

To decide on an object for which to pray be- 
fore beginning. 

To offer the rosary for our Holy Father, our 
bishop, our rector, our confessor, our relatives 
and friends, for the conversion of sinners, the 
welfare of the Catholic Church, and for the 
souls in purgatory. 

To become a member of the society of the 
Holy Rosary, if established in one's parish. 

To always carry a rosary in one's pocket, and 
to say it when travelling, and when not engaged 
otherwise away from home. 

To remember that a muff in winter enables a 
lady to say her rosary without observation. . 



2o6 The Correct Thing 

To remember that beads made of glass or 
other brittle material cannot be indulgenced. 

To know that the indulgences attached to a 
rosary are gained by the first person receiving it 
for use. 

To know that an owner of an indulgenced 
rosary in use cannot transfer rosary with indul- 
gence to another person. 

To know that one may lend a rosary to 
another, but cannot lend the indulgence. 

To know that if one lends a rosary that 
another may gain the indulgence, the rosary 
loses all indulgence and must be blessed again. 

To know that one may oblige another by 
lending a rosary, provided there is no intention 
to transfer the indulgence. 

Or if one's rosary is used without the owner's 
knowledge, the indulgence is not lost. 

To know that the indulgence is attached to 
the rosary and not to the owner ; hence if the 
indulgenced rosary is lost, one cannot supply its 
place by another not blessed. 

To know that a blessed rosary cannot be sold 
without losing its blessing. 



In Regard to the Rosary, 207 

To know that if one is commissioned to pro- 
cure a rosary and have it blessed for another, he 
can demand the amount expended in the pur- 
chase without prejudice to the indulgenced 
rosary. 

To know that a broken bead here and there 
may be renewed without losing the indulgence. 

To know that the cross and five beads usually 
attached to a rosary do not form an essential 
part ; hence if they are lost or broken, the indul- 
gence remains. 

To know that several kinds of indulgences 
may be attached to the same rosary. It is 
probable that each kind should have its special 
intention, as all the kinds of indulgences are not 
gained by the one act. 

To know that by custom the recipient of a 
blessed rosary says the first for the wants of the 
Church, second for the pope, and the third for 
the one who blessed it. 

It is Not the Correct Thing 

To buy a rosary and neglect to have it blessed 
at once. 



2o8 The Correct Thing 

To neglect to obtain certain indulgences when 
the opportunity offers. 

To neglect or refuse to become a member of 
the parish rosary society. 

To omit the daily recitation of one decade if 
a member of the rosary society. 

To neglect to repair one's rosary, or to get a 
new one when broken. 

To omit to carry a blessed rosary on one's 
person. 

To barter one's indulgenced rosary for money 
or valuables. 

To say the rosary without devotion or in a 
hurry. 

To omit reflection upon the mysteries while 
saying the rosary. 

To be ashamed to carry a rosary or to recite 
it with others in common. 

To imagine that the rosary is a form of prayer 
for the use of old people or those not able to 
read. 

To be satisfied on occasion to say the rosary 
on one's fingers : this, however, is better than 
nothing. 



In Regard to the Rosary, 209 

To borrow the rosary of another when one 
can easily get his own. 

To ask the use of a rosary which is known to 
have special indulgences attached to it. 

To buy from pedSlers what they falsely assert 
are indulgenced rosaries from the Holy Land or 
elsewhere. 

To have one's rosary blessed by every strange 
priest one meets. 

To think that there is any special merit for a 
lazy Christian to hang a rosary upon his bed- 
post when he might keep it in a more accessible 
place, such as his pocket. 

To exchange rosaries in order to exchange the 
indulgences attached to each. (Both rosaries 
lose any indulgence they may have when this is 
done.) 



2IO 



The Correct Thing 



THE CORRECT THING IN SAYING THE 
ROSARY. 



It is the Correct Thing 

To recite the Apostles* Creed on the crucifix 
attached to the rosary. 

On the large bead the Gloria and Our Father. 

On the three small beads three Hail Marys. 
On the first with the invocation *' Increase my 
faith ;'* on the second, '^ Strengthen my hope ;" 
on the third, " Inflame my heart with the fire of 
divine love." 

To know that the fifteen decades which con- 
stitute the whole rosary are divided into three 
parts, to be recited on different days. 

The five Joyful Mysteries. 

For Mondays and Thursdays, the Sundays of 
Advent, and from the Epiphany until Lent. 

ist. The Annunciation. 

[The Angel Gabriel announced to the Blessed 
Virgin that she would be the Mother of God.] 

2d. The Visitation. 



In Saying the Rosary, 211 

[The Blessed Virgin pays a visit to her cousin, 
St. Elizabeth, before the birth of St. John.] 

3d. The Nativity. 

[The birth of Our Saviour in a stable at Beth- 
lehem.] 

4th. The Presentation. 

[The Blessed Virgin on the day of her purifi- 
cation presented the Child Jesus in the Temple, 
where holy Simeon gave thanks and received 
Him in his arms.] 

5th. The finding of Jesus in the Temple. 

[The Blessed Virgin lost her Beloved Son in 
Jerusalem, and having searched for Him three 
days, found Him in the Temple in the midst of 
the Doctors, hearing them and asking them 
questions.] 

The Sorrowful Mysteries. 

For Tuesdays and Fridays and Sundays in 
Lent. 

ist. The Agony in the Garden. 

[Our Lord praying in the Garden of Olives was 
so overcome with anguish that He sweat blood.l 

2d. The Scourging. 



212 The Correct Thing 

[Our Lord was bound to a pillar and scourged 
in the house of Pilate.] 

3d. The Crowning with Thorns. 

[The Jews placed a crown of thorns on the 
Sacred Brow, pressing it into the flesh, and 
mocked Him, crying, " Hail, King of the Jews !"] 

4th. The Carrying of the Cross. 

[Jesus, being condemned to death, was forced 
to carry His cross to Calvary.] 

5th. The Crucifixion. 

[Our Lord was nailed to the cross and cruci- 
fied between two thieves, suffering His agony 
for three hours.] 

The Glorious Mysteries. 

For Wednesdays and Saturdays, and the Sun- 
days from Easter until Advent. 

I St. The Resurrection. 

[Our Lord arose the third day from the tomb, 
the first Easter.] 

2d. The Ascension. 

[Forty days after the Resurrection Our Lord 
ascended into heaven in the presence of the 
Blessed Virgin and His Apostles.] 

3d. The Descent of the Holy Ghost. 



\ 



In Saying the Rosary, 213 

[Ten days after His ascension Our Lord sent 
the Holy Ghost on His Apostles in the form of 
fiery tongues, after which they separated to ful- 
fil their missions in the different parts of the 
world.] 

4th. The Assumption. 

[Our Lady died twelve years after the resur- 
rection of her Divine Son, and her body was 
assumed into heaven by angels.] 

5th. The Coronation. 

[The Blessed Virgin was crowned the Queen 
of heaven by her Son.] 

A pious and laudable custom prevails in many 
families to add to the ordinary rosary one decade 
for the suffering souls in purgatory. 



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